


Childhood best friends

by newtmasmultifandom



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Anal Sex, Awkward Sex, Best Friends, Best Friends to Lovers, Bisexual, College, Domestic, Drunk Sex, First Kiss, First Time, Fluff, Gay, Losing virginities, M/M, Male Pregnancy, Mentions of alcohol, Mpreg, Pregancy, Sex, Smut, Threesome, romantic, ziam
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-11-14
Updated: 2018-11-14
Packaged: 2019-08-23 15:39:04
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 35,293
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16621757
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/newtmasmultifandom/pseuds/newtmasmultifandom
Summary: Is your best friend really your best friend if he doesnt offer to have sex with you?





	Childhood best friends

**Author's Note:**

> Sooo, i wrote this Ziam fanfic like 3 or 4 years ago. I just re-read it today and corrected mistakes and deleted cringe scenes. Sorry if i missed some lmao!! 
> 
> ALSO WARNING: if you do not like mpreg then dont read. He does go through a surgery, so the baby does not come out of his anus.

Liam's POV  
I were lying on my dorm bed, and Zayn were lying on his, on the other side of the dorm.. We were exchanging looks every now and then. He would like wink his eye or something, and I would lick my lips and in the end we would burst out laughing. I feel very comfortable around him, and no wonder, I've literally known him for 18 years. I first met him in the hospital. 

Our mums are best friends, and they gave birth to us the same time. Of course Zayn happens to be few days older, but.. His mum had just gotten out of the hospital when I was born, they visited us and that's when I first 'met' Zayn. Not exactly met met, but kinda met. The next time I saw him, was probably few weeks later. 

And that's how we ended up seeing each others every now and then. We went the same preschool, same elementary school, same secondary school, same high school and now we attended the same collage. We were always on the same class, and if I chose music so did Zayn, or if I chose P.E, so did Zayn. And now when I chose this collage, Zayn chose this too, and asked for an roommate. And here we are. It's kinda cute, to be honest. It's nice to know that I have someone as amazing as Zayn on my side. And I'd like to think that we're gonna stay as close as long as our mums did. Like when I find a man I wanna spend the rest of my life with, and when Zayn finds a women he wanna spend the rest of his life with. We could start our own little families, and meet up every once in a life.

And me and my man could adopt kids and Zayn's future wife could get pregnant and we would visit them, and maybe our kids are gonna be best friends too, and so on, and so on.. 

OK you wanna hear about me and Connor?

Well it was just before I graduated from High School, I met him and I fell instantly in love. He told me he did too, and we started dating two weeks later. The first few months were competely amazing, then there was something missing but we quickly hid it. And now, during these last two months, sex has been the only thing on his mind. 

I get it, we hadn't had sex yet and it's totally understandable that he wants to, and I totally get it. I do too, but I'm not ready to have sex with him. Well I'm not sure if I am, but I just don't know what to do. Like literally what to do during the sex, if he notices I'm a virgin. If he gets mad, or laughs, or thinks I'm pathetic. If he leaves me, or if he rapes me after I refuse to have sex with him. If he hits me, or worse, if he tells everyone I'm a virgin and comes up with these stupid rumours. 

OK STOP LIAM!? Why do I think these thoughts? I love him and he loves me, and he wouldn't do anything like that to me, would he? NO! OF COURSE HE WOULDN'T!! Right? 

Like reading my thoughts, Connor called me. I picked up the phone and answered with shaky voice, I just thought about him hitting me and laughing, and now he calls me. I'm such a bad boyfriend. 

"Uh, Hi?" I answered with shaky voice. 

"Hey Babe! It's me Connor..?" He said with guestioning voice. Oh god, did I sound rude?

"Uh yeah, I know.." I said

"Are you like... Mad?" 

"No, why would I be mad?" 

"I don't know." He said back, with little harsh voice. Ouch, that hurt. I sighed quietly, but loud enough for Zayn to hear, because his face popped up and he frowned his brows. I send a quick smile at him, and he shrugged it off for a while. "Are you ok, babe?" 

"Uh, yeah, I am. Why wouldn't I be?"

"Well, I don't know!! Maybe because you keep sounding fucking confused and depressed. Are you alright or are you not, just answer me you idiot!!" He yelled. I turned to see Zayn, and he had shocked expression, maybe he heard it through phone. I sighed again, and Zayn's face filled with understanding and compassion. Two things I'd never see on Connor's face.

"I'm fine, Connor. Now why did you call?" I ask, trying to change the subject. And the fact that he just cursed on me. He called me motherfucker, and he yelled at me. I'm not gonna bring that up, just because I hate fighting and I try to be as polite as I can. And I hardly ever say no to anyone. Well, anyone except Zayn. I can be myself around him, but we never fight. Seriously, ever. 

"I don't know, I guess I just wanted to check up on you. But if you don't wanna talk, I can hang up and call you later when you're in a better mood." He hissed. 

What the fuck is this shit? He is the one yelling at me, and he claims I'm not in a good mood. Well, he should know that I were in a perfect mood earlier, when we were goofing around with Zayn, and instantly when he calls, I turn into this quiet boy who can't make up his mind about sex. 

"No, we can talk if you want. I wasn't doing anything special anyways, we're just in our dorm with Zee." I say and Zayn sends me a smile, and I do too. 

"Oh, well would you like to get back to it?" He asks, hint of a jealous in his voice. 

"Babe, I've told you that there's nothing between me and him. Like numerous times, literally. There is nothing between me and Zayn, we've been best friends since we were in diapers and you know that. He's been there for me, and I've been there for him, but that's it. Look, you don't need to be jealous. You can come here and check if you don't believe me." I explain and I hear him sigh loudly and deeply. 

"No, uh, it's fine. I believe you babe. It's just that... You've known each others 18 years. You've probably seen each others naked numerous times, and you've probably taken bubble baths when you were younger and I just don't think someone's able to be best friends with someone that long. Like 18 years, if I'd had a boy best friend, I'd probably fall for him. Like Zayn, yes he is straight and he wouldn't fall for another boy, but you... You could. You could fall for him, right? I mean, you are practically the same person. You guys cuddle, and sometimes feed each others, fill each other's sentences, and you know him better than he knows himself and he knows you better than you know yourself, and I repeat, you have seen him naked, and you tell me the feelings you have for him are only platonic?"

"Uh.." I got speechless, wow, I never thought Connor felt that way. "Yeah? He is my best friend, and I love him, but only platonacilly." 

"Why did you hesitate?" He asks

"Connor, I didn't hesitate. I just... I never knew you thought stuff like that. Look, if you don't believe me, then come here. Or we can spend time more together, and you'll see I only have my eyes for you." I suggest. 

"It's fine babe, if you say you don't love him like that, then I believe you. I trust you, Liam. You'd never lie to me, and I'd never lie to you either. You can trust me, too." He said, and I smiled at his words. 'You would never lie to me', oh if you only knew Connor, if you only knew. 

"Yeah.." I sigh

"I love you." He said after a minute of silence. 

"I love you too, Connor." I say and Zayn's face popped up, huge grin on his face. I smiled back at him. And felt Connor mumbling something. "What was that?"

"I asked, if you'd like to come here and show me just how much you love me." He probably winked his eye. And I felt a lump in my throat getting in the way, and felt my chest tighten, and heart beats getting faster, and my palms sweating. What did he just say? Did he just suggest what I think?

"Uh, what you mean?" 

"Isn't it time for us to take our relationship into the next level, babe?" 

"Y-yeah, I guess.." I say, little bit hesitating. What am I gonna do? I can't say no to him, not now when Zayn's watching, he'd ask me punch of these questions and all.. 

"Really?! You're ready to take our relationship to the next level?" He exclaimed

"Uh, yes, I guess.." I mumbled. I nodded. "Yes, I am. When?" I asked with shaky tone that made Zayn worry. He looked at me again. I shook my head. He didn't believe me this time, so instead of shrugging it off. He got up and walked to my bed, next to me. 

"Tomorrow? Come to mine, and I'm gonna give you the best fuck you've ever had." He said, obvious smirk in his voice. And I wanted to say that it'd be my first fuck too. 

"O-ok, I'll see you tomorrow.." I said, trying to hold back the tears. Zayn took my free hand in his, and brought it to his face and kissed it gently. I ended the phone call and he pulled me into a hug. I cried into his shoulder, and he squeezed me tightly. I cried harder, and so he squeezed me tighter. 

"What's wrong? Did you guys fight?" He asked and I shook my head. 

"No, yes, no.. Kinda but no. He called me an idiot, and yelled at me for spending time with you, but when I said I love him, he said that I should go and tell him how much I really love him. And he meant sex.. But I'm still a virgin and he thinks I'm not.." I say, and look up to meet his worried face. 

"How can he think you're not? Even I knew you're still a virgin." He said

"Well, I could have kinda told him, that I'm not.." I said, scratching my neck. 

"What?! Liam why would you do that!!?" He asked, and I shrugged. Didn't dare to speak or look at him right now. "Babe.. Why didn't you just tell him you are? I'm sure if he loves you, he would understand. Right?" He asked, making me think about it twice. Like, if he would love me, he would understand that I haven't been ready. 

"You'd think.." I say quietly and he hugs me again. "But I'm fine, I just.. Need to come up with an explanation, why I don't wanna have sex with him tomorrow suddenly. Because there is no way in hell, I'm gonna go to his place, and let him have his ways with me, and give me the best fuck I've ever had." I say mocking Connor's earlier sentence. Not that I wanna mock him, I love him, but I sounded rude when he really didn't know how things are.. Zayn pulled away and locked our eyes. 

"Did he say that?!" He yelled, and I nodded. "I knew there were a reason I never liked that guy." He sighs and I shook my head

"Zayn, I love him. He's my boyfriend. I wanna go there and be intimate with him, but I just don't wanna do it while I'm still a virgin. I am ready, I've been for an month now. But I don't think I want to have my first time with him. Like if he knew I were a virgin, and if he were a virgin as well, than I wouldn't think twice about it. But when he doesn't, and when he's not, NO... Just no.."I explain and he nods. 

"I get it, I would probably do the same thing too. And if it makes you feel any better, I'm a virgin too." Zayn says and my whole world stops. 

"What?! You're a virgin!?" I ask. And he chuckles

"Haha, why do you sound so surprised? And yes I am."

"Oh, wow.. I just never would have guessed." I say and smile and he smiles too. "But thank you for telling me, Zayn. And yes, it did make me feel better. To know that I'm not a pathetic because I'm still a virgin." 

"You're not pathetic. And if you are, then we'll be pathetic together." He said proudly and I high-fived him. We hugged there for a while, we cuddled in my bed, and stared at the roof. Well, I think he had his eyes closed, but I stared at the roof. 

He is so warm, and I love his scent. I know that all this might sound like we are dating, but I'd never fall for him, he's just my best friend, and I love to cuddle with him. Mostly just because he loves to cuddle with me too. 

"I could help you, you know.." He says. I frown my brows. 

"With what?" I ask, totally oblivion. 

"With the sex thing." He gulps

"How are you gonna help with that?" I ask and he doesn't answer, and then it hits me, oh..."Oh..Why?"

"I mean you are my best friend, and I'd do anything for you." He says and sits up to meet my eyes. He does have beautiful eyes. "Do you love him?" I nod. "Does he love you?"  
"So he says, yes." 

"And he wants to shag you?" He asks, and I nod again. "And you wanna have sex with him?" 

"Yes." 

"But...?"

"But as long as I'm still a virgin, I don't." I say and he gives me this 'I told you so', look and I hate it.

"Yeah, so...I can help you with that, so when you do go to his place tomorrow, he can give you the best fuck you've ever had. AKA, better than with me." He speaks, with shaky tone. 

"Are you sure about this? Because it seems rather odd." I say

"Yes, I'm sure. But if you don't wanna, it's fine. I were only suggesting."

"No!! I get it. It's fine, and.. I wanna have sex with him tomorrow, I really do. I love him, and we've been together for six months now.. So I think it's time anyways.." 

"So, ok?"

"Ok." I answered. 

He nodded and rested on his elbows and his hands extended slowly but surely to my hoodie and took the zipper. He started slowly pulling it down, locking our eyes. He was shaking a little bit, and breathing heavily. Why did he suggest it if he's this nervous? 

"Zayn if yo--" He cuts me off

"It's ok, Li. I wanna help you, you're my best friend. I'd die for you, million times in a row." He says and I nod. He continues pulling down the zipper. Our eyes still locking, he pulls of my hoodie. I extend my hands to let it slid off of me. I still have my white tank top and my jeans and socks. He looks deep into my eyes, before taking the hem of my shirt inside his hands, and curling his fingers around it. He very slowly starts pulling it off of me, still trying to calm his breathing. 

I'm not sure if this is a good thing or not. 

I then lift my hands, and he pulls it off before tossing it to the floor. He locks our eyes once more, and something flashes through his eyes, maybe it's regret or pity. I don't know. He tugs on his own shirt, and pulls it quickly over his head, before tossing it next to my shirt. I felt right then and there something in the bit of my stomach. Not right sure what it was. Was it regret? Or were I this scared? But this is Zayn we're talking about, and he'd never hurt me. He just said that he'd die for me, million times in a row. 

I saw his tattoos again. Oh I love his tattoos, but I've never seen them this close. Like as well as I can see them now. I extended my hand to touch them, and I saw him flinch a bit. Like in a surprise. I ran my fingers slowly over his tattoos, and examined them all. I took in all the thoughts I had about him and them. I've never seen him this naked before. Like this. Or this close, or this intimate. So it's a bit different, yeah. But I'm ok with this. It's not awkward or anything. I mean yeah, it is, but I can live with this. 

"What's with you and my tattoos? You've always been so intrigued about them.." He said slowly and softly. I smiled and shrugged. To be honest, his tattoos has always turned me on, big time. I couldn't say that to him, tho. He turned us so he was hovering on top of me. "OK, excuse me for not knowing what to do, but it's my first time, so I might be awkward or something.." He admitted

"Zayn, it's my first time too, so I wouldn't know what to do either. So anything we do, is probably gonna be nice. Trust me." I said, trying to assure him. And maybe myself too. He looked like that was exactly wanted to hear, because he looked rather relieved and kind of.... happy. He smiled before slithering his hand towards my crotch. He opened my trouser's button. And the zipper, and that's when I had to bite onto my tongue. I didn't know how to react anyway. 

He lowered his head, to see where my trousers border where. He curled his fingers around it and pulled my jeans down. I blinked harshly few times, and took a deep breathe. Zayn smiles assuringly, making me believe that I can do this. And maybe I can.  
Once the jeans were off, he got up to take his. And then we were both only on our boxers, and he locked our eyes, and bit his lip harshly, making me wonder how come he's not bleeding yet. Haha. 

"Zayn--" He cut me off by pressing finger to my lips. 

"Shh.. It's ok, babe." He said, before pressing one kiss to my cheek. "Just give me a minute to process this, ok?" 

"Ok, take two if you need." 

"I don't, but thank you." He said, and I nodded.

He hovered on top of me again, before locking our eyes once again. I saw him thinking something, and the only thing I thought was how beautiful his eyes were. He placed his hands on my neck and rubbed the skin with his thumbs, like not sure what to do. He leaned closer, very slowly. And kissed my cheek again. He released his other hand and leaned closer to leave tender kiss to my neck. And another, and another and another. All these tender kisses to my jawline and when he was done with my jawline, he went to my collarbone, and softly nibbled on that skin. 

I let out a small voice, but immediately regretted it. I don't know why, since people are suppose to moan during sex. Zayn grabbed his arms around my waist, and lifted my hips up, and kissed my neck harder. Like trying to make me moan again, but still tried to be as gentle as possible. I wrapped my fingers through his hair, and my legs around his waist. This scene were actually really hot, like really really hot. 

Two boys in their boxers, the other one kissing the other's neck, and the other has his legs tossed around the other one's waist. Both turned on little bit. Seriously, I'm not kidding, I swear to you, I can feel something grinding against my bum. Like earlier, I felt it against my thigh, but now when I have my legs around his waist, I feel it against my bum. And I'm almost 100% sure it's Zayn's growing boner. 

Zayn let out breathless voice, like he's running out of air, and that made me hotter. Like feeling like I need to take off my clothes, but hey, I'm already just on my boxers so yeah, it's him. So I tried another thing. I tried grinding my bum against his growing boner, and he let out husky moan against my collarbone. Oh yeah, definitely a growing boner. I did that again, so I made this delicious feeling for the both of us. I felt his almost rock hard boner against my bum, and he felt my bum against his almost rock hard boner.

"Li.." He breathed out. I didn't care what he was about to say, I just continued grinding against his cock. It feels weird to say that, but nah, it's fine if it feels this good. He pulled away from my neck, and locked our eyes, biting his lip. 

"Zayn, are you sure you wanna do it?" I asked, like assuring that he doesn't have to do it. Weirdly, I wanna do it.

"Yes." He nodded eagerly but then corrected himself: "I wanna help you get over this fear." He repeats and I nod. 

"Whatever, it's fine, Zayn." I said, I wanted him to get on with it. I wanted to know how he feels. If he's big or small or if he's rough or gentle, tho I bet he's gonna be gentle. 

"Right." He said and took the waistline of my boxers inside his fingers before locking our eyes and pulling them down. "You probably want me to prep you, am I right?" he asked. And I blush bright read. The thought of Zayn sticking his fingers up to my ass. Oh my god, what are we doing? 

"Uh, I.." I were completely speechless.  
"It's ok, I can do it, Liam." He said, and I bit my lip and nodded. "Oh, yeah, ok.." He breathed. "This might sting a little bit, or not.. I wouldn't know." He said "You ready?"

"Y-Yeahh.." I mumbled and closed my eyes. 

"No, Liam. Look at me." He says and I blush even harder. I blink few times before making an eye contact with him. He reached the lube he had brought closer to us some minutes ago, he opened the bottle, and lubed his fingers before looking into my eyes. He looks different than usually. He pushes one finger in, only the tip. But after few seconds, he decided he'd go through with it and he pushed it deeper. I took deep breathes. Because it didn't hurt at all, to be honest, but it sure wasn't enjoyable, it was weird. Really weird, not uncomfortable but not comfortable either. 

"You alright there?" He asked, and I nodded, biting my lip, still looking up at him, like he asked. He was looking at me the whole time, not once looked away. He was either looking at my eyes or glancing at my lips every once in a while. He pushed the finger harder, first time making something good spread through me. He did it again, and I pushed my bum onto his finger, wanting him to do it harder. He didn't notice it tho. 

"You ok with another finger?" He asked, and seriously I weren't sure but I still nodded. "Ok." He carefully pushed another finger, inside of me. And tried to do it, as nice as possible. He worked with those fingers for few minutes. And it was starting to get boring, so I asked for an third. He was little bit taken back, but did so either way. He added third and worked on third fingers for an minute, or two. Before asking if I were still ok, and I said yes. "Alright." He said, before pulling his fingers off. 

He got up from the bed and went to his drawer, and pulled out a condom. He then hovered on top of me again, and placed the condom on himself. And don't blame me for watching, but have you like seen him? And not Zayn, but Zayn's him. It's huge. Ok, maybe not as huge as mine, but omg, I regret doing this with him, even tho it hasn't even started but I can't stop now. It would be super embarrassing for him. And for me too. 

He lined up against my entrance, and kind of just.. rubbed his cock against my entrance. I've never been touched this way, and I don't know how to feel about it. I'm kind of scared, but kind of in a good way. Because I know I can trust Zayn with my life, so I feel safe now as well. And maybe when I feel comfortable during sex, I could do it with Connor. As in tomorrow. 

"You ready with me going in now?" He asked, and planted a kiss on my neck. I nodded and he sighed. "Alright." He pushed himself in, and I gotta say. It didn't hurt as much as I thought. Of course it stinged a little bit, but that's why Zayn waited for an minute, or maybe two, before asking again. "You alright?"

"I'm ok." 

"Good." He answered and kissed my cheek. "Can I kiss you?" He asked. 

"W-What?"

"Can I kiss you?" He repeated, and I didn't think, I just nodded. He nodded back before leaning closer, and pressed our lips together. He moved his lips slowly, and I did too. Making them move in beautiful slow sync. It wasn't dominant, or sloppy or hot. It was slow and beautiful. It was quite long kiss, but it was amazing. 

Like, I could have never thought I'd say this. But Zayn's lips felt amazing against mines, beautiful, soft and I never wanted to stop kissing him. I placed my hand on his neck, and at the same time, he pushed in completely. I gasped a little bit, but we kept kissing. Like, trying to distract me from it. I hummed against his lips, like asking him to move. I'm not sure what I will do after this thing, but I wont stop being Zayn's friend. Right?  
He slowly moved, in and out of me. Few times slowly, before stopping and disconnecting our lips. 

"Talk to me baby." He said softly. Is it wrong for me to think that even tho is is the most awkward thing that has ever happened to me, I've never felt so safe and sound? 

"About what?" I asked, closing my eyes. He still moved, thrusted. 

"About anything, like, how did you like the sunshine today?" He asked

"Are you seriously asking me about the wheather?" I asked, chuckling little bit. He bit his lip, and closed his eyes, huffing silently, before nodding. 

"Yeah, I am. So, how did you like it?" 

"It was warm day, yeah, and it was nice in class because the sun shined through the windows. Remember?" I asked and he opened his eyes again, locking them with mines. He nodded. 

He pounded into me, still gently, but he picked up the space little bit. It felt really weird, it felt little bit of good, but he was still moving slowly so I couldn't decide if I liked it, or not. I placed my hands around his back, and I felt him getting goosebumps, did he really get them because of me? Aww, how cute... Maybe. 

"So, Liam, I heard your mum f-found a new job." He said, letting out one small moan.

"Oh, wow, w-where did you heard that?" I ask, running my hand all around his back. 

"My mum.." He rolled his eyes, and I nodded, understanding. Because hey, they're best friends just like we are. 

Zayn picked up the space, until he wasn't thrusting in slowly anymore. I gotta be honest with you, I loved it. I completely loved it. I admit it, at first it was awkward and uncomfortable but as the time passed, it was nice. And now I love this. I scratched his back, like not only running my fingers on his back, I also had nails working there.  
After few long minutes, I heard him hissing and I were loving every second of his horny voices. I felt my own rock hard boner, hitting my lower stomach, but I didn't wanna do anything with that. 

"Zayn.." I whimpered. Not knowing what to say or what to do, but I couldn't be quiet as it felt so fucking good. "Uh, god.." I moaned, leaning my head back. I then felt something wet on my lips, and realized that Zayn's kissing me again. I let him kiss me, in fact, I kissed him back. He grabbed his hungry lips around my bottom lip, and tugged on it with his teeth. I moaned hotly into his mouth. I felt need on my lower region, and I knew that I had to do something. I slowly grabbed my hand around my leaking cock, and tugged on it few times slowly, as I took in all Zayn's thrusts and continued letting him explore my mouth with his tongue. Oh yeah, we have tongues too. 

"Fuck, Li, I'm so close." He said against my tongue, and I frowned my brows mentally. 

"Uh, y-yeahh.. Me too-o." I stuttered through all the pushes, and tugs. I tugged on my penis harder, and sensed myself probably on the edge of my climax as well. At least it feels like it. So it's possible. After few hot and sweaty moments of thrusting and moaning and tugging on my penis, we both reached our highs. 

"Oh, god.. uh, Liam.."He cursed as he pounded into me and I felt him jab something, like push into something and it made amazing feeling spread through me..

"Zayn, God, Zee, fuck."

"You're doing so good Liam, you're so good. And tight. Babe, you're so good, babe.." Zayn explained as I kept pumping my cock, trying different ways. I thumbed the top, and groaned. Zayn fucked into me, making me feel overwhelming sensation again. Warm vibe running through my whole body, making my head spin. 

"God Zayn. Oh god, f-fuck. Just, oh god, I think....Uhh.." I whined as Zayn tried to fuck me harder cursing under his breathe and I knew this was it. 

Him shooting his loads into the condom and I shooted mine onto our chests, but he didn't seem to mind because all he did was gasp out loud before pulling out and dropping next to me. He pulled off of the condom and tossed it to the carbage next to my bed. We were both quiet for a little while. 

"Can I kiss you?" He blurted out. 

"What?"

"Can I kiss you again?" He asked and I thought it for a second, but then I remembered how good it had felt. And the sex, it was amazing. I just nodded. 

"Yes." 

"Good." He smiled sheepishly. 

He hovered on top of me, and leaned closer, resting our foreheads together. He looked inside my eyes, and I did too. I looked inside his eyes, and weirdly, I felt butterflies in my stomach, but I chose to ignore them for now. 

"Was it bad?" He asked, biting his lip. I felt his warm breathe against my face, and all I wanted to do was just kiss his awkwardness and shyness away. "Was I bad?" he asked again, this time blushing little bit. 

I smirked, and bit my own lip before shaking my head and locking our eyes. He gave me an eskimo kiss and smiled softly at me.

"Good, I was little afraid I'd suck at sex because I literally didn't know how to do things properly and what would feel good for you." He admitted, resting his forehead against mine. I smiled at him, sheepishly. 

"It was good. No need to be afraid, Zayn." I said and he nodded. 

"I wanted to make it special, I wanted to make you feel safe and warm and loved because it was your first time." 

"Just having you here, makes me feel safe and loved." I said and he was taken back, he surely didn't expect that answer. I chuckled. "Gonna kiss me or what?" I asked, smirking and he scoffed. 

"Eager, now are we?" He threw back. He pecked my lips. 

"Or maybe I just like your lips." I said, kissing him once gently. He kissed me back once. 

"Really?" Zayn whispered as we kissed few times quickly, and I giggled, pecking his lips. 

"Maybe.." I kissed him and he kissed me back. We didn't made out, we exchanged quick kisses. I giggled through the kisses. He then gave me a deep kiss. Like he kissed me, but didn't pull away. I froze, does he want me to kiss him back? He didn't move his lips tho, so I don't know.. 

Wait, no, now he did move his lips. I mentally slapped myself for not moving mines. I sighed and moved my lips with him. He smiled shyly into the kiss, and I cupped his cheeks. Our lips moved slowly, and beautifully in sync. 

It was really nice. Yeah, nice to kiss your best friend. Shut up. No you shut up. Alright then.  
I felt something, and at first I wasn't sure what it was. I felt it on my cock, but then it hit me. It was Zayn. He had his hand wrapped around mine and his cock. And he were rubbing them, and he were kissing me. 

"Z-Zayn.. Ugh.. Mmm.." I huffed leaning my head back. He were groaning in pleasure too, hiding his face in my neck. "Oh, mhm.." My back arched and he planted kisses on my neck, and purred into my ear. 

"Li.. Mhfmh.." Was all he said, before licking my earlobe. All this felt so freaking good. His cock rubbing against mine, and he licking and tugging on my earlobe. He suddenly stopped. He released our cocks, and he rolled lower to kiss my collarbone. I huffed, tugging on his hair gently. He lowered himself even more. 

He was now kissing my chest, going for my nipple. He just kissed it and kitten licked it, but then went lower. He kissed my abs, my little pathetic abs. He kissed my abdomen everywhere, and took my cock inside his hand. He very slowly moved his hand up and down, and thumbed the top. 

"Z-Zayn.." I huffed out. "The thing you did first, d-do it again." I said, biting my lip. 

"Uh.. You mean, like, both of our c--" 

"Yeah!" I quickly cut him off so he didn't get to say it. And it's better that way. This is awkward enough, but I don't wanna stop now. I wanna reach my high. I wanna reach my high with him. He nodded and hovered on top of me. Our eye locking, and he pecked my lips. He then wrapped both of his hands around our cocks. Like earlier. 

He started rubbing them little bit, and I huffed. He did so too. Well his huff were closer to groan, but I don't care. He hid his face into my neck once more and rubbed our dicks together, while thrusting against mine, helping us reach our climaxes. 

"Uh, Li.. Ugh, uh.." Zayn said, while rocking his body against mine. "Uh, uh.." Was all I heard from him. 

"Zayn, uh, god." I said, my back arching. I felt the wonderful feeling approaching and I rocked my body upwards, as Zayn rocked his body against mine, making our dicks moved against each others, faster and harder. Sending amazing feeling run through our bodies. 

"Li, oh god.." Zayn said and I felt something on my lower stomach. I saw Zayn shooting his seeds onto our chests. I felt myself lose it too, while he was still reaching the end.  
And so we came together, we found our highs together, and the only voice in the room for few seconds were our groans as we finished our highs and released our shots.  
He dropped next to me, and we both panted. The next minute were with me and him, breathing heavily. After a while, he spoke. 

"Can I sleep next to you?" He asked, sounding very vulnerable. 

"Yes, of course you can silly." I say and he sighs in relief before cuddling closer to me. I pulled up the covers, and turned so my back was facing his front. He wrapped his arms around my waist, and yup, it's awkward since we're both nude. But frankly neither of us mind, like we just cuddled. Like we always too, but we didn't mind us being naked. Or neither of us to realized. Well, I did. But maybe he didn't realize that it'd be little odd.  
After few minutes of thinking what the hell did we just do, I heard Zayn snoring. Oh ok, he's sleeping. I glanced at my phone, and saw it was 10pm. Oh it was already late when we did what we did? I didn't notice. 

Then it hit me. I just had sex with Zayn Malik. My best friend since diapers. Me Liam Payne, had just amazing sex with my best friend Zayn Malik. Oh my god, what will I do tomorrow? Like I can't get up and leave now, it would be coward thing to do. And I can't embarrass Zayn like that. Because if he'd get up while I'm sleeping, and when I'd wake up, he wouldn't be next to me. 

It would be really really embarrassing, so no.. I'm not gonna do that. I'm gonna sleep next to him, and think what the fuck did we just do?!  
I should have never agreed to this. We were seriously intimate with each others. The moans were coming from both of our mouths, and he were grabbing my hair between his hands, and I had my hands running behind his back. He entered me, and had his ways with me and I enjoyed every second of it. 

I loved how safe he made me feel, he kept asking if I were ok and I didn't mind him asking. It was nice that he did so. He were gentle and slow, and soft and caring and loving. Tho during the end, it heated up a little bit, and I were practically begging him to fuck me harder. Oh my god, why did I need to do that? He's gonna think I'm crazy...  
BUT, even tho, if someone's crazy here, it's Zayn. I mean he's straigther than a ruler, and just because I'm his best friend, he offered to help me with this sex thing. So I said ok, and we had sex. He had sex with a boy, just to help out his best friend. AND HE ALSO SAID HE WAS STILL A VIRGIN?! So, that means that we lost our virginities to each others.  
I'm not gonna ignore the warm and happy feeling I get when I think of us in bed. Or the warm and happy feeling I got when we were in bed. Or the thought of us losing our virginities to each others, what's wrong with me?  
Knowing that Zayn lost his virginity to me, makes me feel somewhat special.  
And I love that feeling. 

~~*~~  
I fell asleep thinking about Zayn last night, and I woke up and the first I thought was Zayn. And me. Us. In bed. It was just something so great. I don't think I can be able to forget about how his touch felt. So tender and gentle, so soft and caring. His warm hand, cupping my cheeks, while gently kissing my lips.  
Oh, and that kiss. OK I NEED TO STOP!! BUT I CAN'T!! I can't stop thinking about that kiss. His lips felt magical against mines, his lips soft yet rough against mines. They moved in perfect sync, like we knew perfectly what the other one was about to do. And how the other one was about to move his lips. We just knew.  
The thought of Zayn wanting to keep me safe, gave me goosebumps, and unfortunately butterflies. Yes, butterflies. Fucking butterflies. I don't wanna feel butterflies when I think of him. I wanna feel butterflies when I think of Connor. 

Connor.  
I'm suppose to have sex with him today. Nope. There's no way in hell I'm gonna do that. Maybe a blowjob, but nope, not a chance. I don't wanna have sex with him. Seriously right now, I wouldn't even cry if we broke up. But of course I would, he's my boyfriend of six months. And I love him. Of course I love him.  
But if you had to choose between Connor and Zayn, who would it be, Liam?  
No, don't ask me those kind of questions. I can't choose between my boyfriend, and my best friend. Of course I trust Zayn more and I've known him longer. But I love Connor, and we've been through so many things. And we've had fun together. But... It's just that, yesterday morning when I saw Zayn sleeping, I thought 'Hah, he is still sleeping, maybe I should pull a prank on him or something..' And this morning when I'm seeing how he still sleeps, all I can think of is; 'Oh, I never noticed how flawless he looks while sleeping', and I know it's wrong to think this way, but I can't help it. It's true. 

I mean yeah, I always knew that Zayn is good looking and attractive. But no, I never noticed how truly beautiful he is.. I caressed his cheek gently, so I wouldn't wake him. I got up and put on a pair of boxers before getting back in bed and cuddling closer to the covers. My phone rang, and Zayn groaned. I mentally groaned when I saw how it was. Connor.  
Wait, no, why did I mentally groaned? He's my boyfriend and I should be happy to see him calling me.. OK, just answer the goddamn phone, Liam!! 

"Hey.." I mumbled through my morning voice. I clearead my throat after hearing how husky I sounded. 

"Uh, hey babe, did I wake you up?" He asked. 

"No you didn't, I woke up like ten minutes ago." I answered truthfully. 

"Oh, well, good. I was just checking if you're still gonna come to my place tonight." He said, and my heart started jumping. What am I gonna do? OK, Liam you got exactly two seconds to decide. Whether you want to or don't want to have sex with Connor tonight. "Babe?"

"Uh, sorry babe, what?" I asked, blushing. I guess it was more than two seconds. 

"Are you still coming to my place tonight, and show me how much you really love me?" OK I really did hear what he said, I were just trying to buy some time. But I didn't get to decide yet. I need to say yes, what will I say to him? 'Oh hey babe, I was virgin until last night, but I lost my virginity to Zayn, and now I'm ready to have sex with you.' Never.. 

"Y-Yeah.." I mumbled through gritted teeths. Why am I acting like this? 

"Awesome, I'll make everything ready. All you need to bring is your sexy self. Alright?" He asks, and I bet he's thinking rough sex. Oh god, what am I getting myself into? 

"Uh, yes, sure. I'll see you tonight Connor." I said, quietly. Not wanting Zayn to hear. 

"Bye babe, I love you?" He said, but it sounded more of a question. 

"Yah, I love you too, Connor." I said and dropped my phone to the side of my bed and turned around, only to be able to see Zayn staring at me. 

"Hi." He said. Oh god, if I would have known it's gonna be this awkward, I would have NEVER agreed to have sex with Zayn. 

"Uh, hey.." I said, glancing at his lips, which looked surprisingly good. OK, Liam stop complimenting him. "How did ya sleep?" I asked, because it was way to awkward to be quiet. 

"Good, I guess. You?" 

"Uh, yeah, it was alright." I shrugged. Not looking away from Zayn's eyes. They were pouring into mines, and mine were probably pouring into his. His eyes are the thing I like about him most. I like brown eyes, but my eyes are boring. They're just plain dark brown. He has hazel eyes. They are very beautiful and OMG what did I say about complimenting him?! 

"So.. Was it Connor who called?" He asked, and I nodded. "Uh, what did he want?" He asked.

"Um, he, uh, he asked if I'm still gonna go to his and let him have his ways with me." I admitted, and Zayn frowned his brows. 

"Are you?" 

"Not sure." I said. "But I did agree to him on the phone, so I can't actually refuse anymore. I mean, this is literally the first time I've said yes to him when he's been asking about us having sex. And now when I've said yes, he sounded sincerely interested and I can't say no anymore. I guess I'm having second thoughts." I say as if it's no big deal. But inside of me, it was huge deal. And someone I were secretly trying to make his jealous. I don't know why I even tried to, because we're best friends. Anyways even if we weren't, it's never gonna work. 

"But Liam, if you don't want to. He can't make you." Zayn said, through gritted teeths. 

"He's not gonna make me do anything!!" I hissed. But when I saw his face, I realized I don't have the rights to hiss at him."But he didn't even know that I'm still a virgin." 

"Was, you're not a virgin anymore." He reminded me. 

"Yeah, I know. That sting on my bum, tells me otherwise." 

"Oh, sorry." He blushed, and ran hand through his hair. He sighed before looking up at me again. 

"It's ok, Zayn, I think it's normal." I said, giggling. And he relaxed little bit for the first time this morning. Maybe this is what we need; laughs, smiles, jokes. Maybe we need some old Ziam time to get back on track. OK, if that's what we need then that's what we're gonna get. 

"So.. When are you gonna go to his house?" 

"Probably something around 6 pm, why?" 

"Well, its only 9am, so we have time to do something. What you wanna do?" He asked. "I mean, it's weekend and all." 

"I'm not sure Zayn, I have homeworks and I need to call mum too. So, maybe after them if we have time, we could do something, yes?" I lied. I don't know why. I just complimented his way too beautiful eyes, and now I don't wanna spend time with him. Liam, are you bloody crazy?!

"Oh, ok then. I guess I'll just call Niall or something." He said, making something fly through my body. 

Tensed. I tensed. Niall. That bloody bastard used to have a crush on my Zayn. There I go again with this 'my zayn' thing, Zayn is not mine and I shouldn't care if Niall has a crush on him. Since Zayn doesn't swing that way. And he has told me before that if he did, I would be his first choice. Which is kind of adorable.  
It was when we where in High school 

*Flashback* 

"Zayn that guy were totally checking you out!" I said giggling, as we were walking through the school halls. There were this guy who just transfered and I swear I've seen him checking Zayn out few times. 

"What? Liam, you know I don't swing that way!" Zayn exclaimed, throwing his hands in the air. 

"I know I know, I just said. And it's not the first time I've seen him staring at your ass." 

"Liam! Shut up! I don't do dick!" He chuckled. "And even if I did, I wouldn't be interested in him." 

"Why's that?" I asked, little bit chuckling. 

"Because you'd be my first choice." He admitted, hint of red grawling up to his cheeks. 

"What you mean first choice?" 

"I mean, that if I were into boys as well. I would be probably head over heels for you, Liam." 

"What? Me? Why me? I'm just Liam.." I said, fiddling with my fingers. I'm pretty sure, I were read as tomato. No one has ever said anything like that to me. 

"No you're not, you're way more than that. You're good looking, attractive, smart, noble, big hearted, funny, friendly and you're so much in every way, Liam." Zayn admitted. 

"Well, thank you Zayn." I said. 

"I'm just saying, I would be crazy if I weren't in love with you." He said, and I swear I saw a blush rushing up to his cheeks before I turned away to look where I heard his name being called. 

"Hey, babe!" Leila shouted and hugged Zayn from behind. Zayn chuckled, and glanced at me before pulling Leila inside his arms. 

"Hey, how you've been, I haven't seen you today yet. Where were you, babe?" Zayn asks, pressing kiss to her lips. 

"Around the school, on classes, and then hanging around with Perrie. What about you?" Leila asked, smiling lovingly at Zayn. 

"Uh, just hanging around with Li." Zayn said tiredly and took Leila's hand and turned around to walk away. Oh, I thought we were gonna get ice creams. If I'd say it didn't sting to see him walk away and forgot what we had planned doing, I would be lying. 

My best friend just chose his two week-ed girlfriend over his 17 year-ed best friend. OK, I get it.. I slowly turned around and saw Zayn glancing at me, but I didn't look at him back. I just sighed and walked away. I almost felt the regret and sorry in the back of his neck. But right now I didn't care, I were furious and furious Liam isn't the one you wanna mess with. 

*Flashback over* 

It really hurt. And I were mad at Zayn for five days, and he apologized, but I didn't forgive him. He asked why I were so mad about something like this. I didn't know tho, I just were. He said that he's gonna break up with Leila if it makes me feel better. And it kinda did.  
I said, that it's not that I don't want them to happy together, I did. But I always felt like Leila stole him away from me. Also, Leila asked me to stay the fuck away from Zayn, because he was hers. I told her that we're just best friends, but she didn't believe me. She said I were in love with Zayn, and all that crab but I just slapped that bitch and ran away.  
I bet Zayn still doesn't know that. 

And yeah, Zayn broke up with her two days later and we continued like nothing had happened. And I can tell that he was rather happy about it. 

"Oh, do whatever you want, but just remember that Niall used to have huge crush on you, Zayn.." I said through gritted teeth. 

"At least he wont ditch me for something as stupid as homework." He spat back. 

"What? I'm not ditching you, I really have homework." I lied again. 

"We did our homeworks together last night, and I know you did them all. You just... Never mind, I'll call Niall, it's none of your fucking business what I do. So stay out of my life!!" He spat once more. 

"Zayn..?" I whined, feeling tears gathering in my eyes. "How can you say that?" 

"You're ditching you're best friend for homeworks tho you had none, but you're still gonna hang with you boyfriend." He spat. I scoffed. 

"Oh yeah, what about the time when we were suppose get ice creams but Leila came and you just left. You didn't even try to come up with usefull explanation to why you're ditching me. You just took her hand and left. You have no idea how it felt." I said, feeling one tear escaping my eye. Why in the deepest hell am I crying?! 

"Oh my god! Are you seriously gonna talk about that?! She was a bitch, who had me wrapped around her fingers, and I had no choice but go with her." He said, not as harshly as earlier, but it was still harsh. 

"No, you did. You took her hand, you started walking away, and you ditched me." I said, another tear escaping my eye. 

"Why are we even talking about this?! You have no idea what was going on between me and her, and you have no right to say if I can hang around with Niall or not.. Just because you don't wanna hang with me tonight, doesn't mean you have to fucking lie about it!! JUST FUCKING ADMIT IT IF YOU DON'T WANT TO HANG WITH YOUR FUCKING BEST FRIEND YOU FUCKING COWARD!!?!" He literally screamed into my face.

"OK I DON'T!! I DON'T WANNA HANG WITH YOU, AND I DON'T WANNA SEE YOUR UGLY ASS FACE! IN FACT, I'M PROBABLY GONNA GO NOW AND LEAVE EARLY TO CONNOR'S PLACE, SO I DON'T NEED TO SEE YOUR FACE TONIGHT! OH AND YOU'RE COMPLETELY RIGHT, I DID MY HOMEWORKS LAST NIGHT... AND FYI, OUR SEX WEREN'T EVEN THAT GOOD!!!!" I spat  
on his face before getting up, and getting my clothes and storming to the bathroom. 

Once I were inside I fell to the ground crying. I crawled against the shower wall, and let the water run, and cried my eyes out. Zayn just yelled at me, he just cursed at me and he called me fucking coward. I can't believe he called me fucking coward. 

I heard a knock on the door. "Liam, I'm sorry.. I didn't mean it. I just.. I don't know. It hurts to know you'd have to lie about something like this. You know.. I get what you felt when I ditched you and the ice creams that day. I remember your hurtfull exression when I looked back, and I couldn't enjoy my date with Leila at all. Because all I could see, was your sad puppy dog face inside my head. Liam, I promise you, you were the only thing in my head that day. Not her or anyone else. You. And I'm sorry I just yelled at you. I just don't like when you lie to me.. I'm sorry." He spoked.

We almost never fight, literally. And now when we did, oh my god, it was horrible. Well it wasn't horrible, it just felt horrible. Well of course it was horrible. I didn't answer him tho. 

"Ok, now you're mad at me. Good. I deserve it. I just want you to know that I'm sorry. I know we don't fight often and there's reasons for that Liam. We get on so well, we're like this one person who got ripped in half, and stuck in two different bodies. Like a one soul, and we're meant to be best friends. Because we're basically the same person. Seriously, Liam. You have no idea, how much it hurts me to see you get hurt. It's like I almost feel the physical pain you feel. And the time when you were in the car accident, I kind of realized that...Never mind. Anyways.. I were just saying that I hate when we fight, because you're my best friend, my brother, my other half, I guess I'm just trying to find a way to apologize for yelling at you. And for what we did last night." Zayn finally stopped. 

And if he would have been here, I would have probably drowned him in kisses.  
I got up from the shower, only wearing the same boxers I put this morning before Connor called me. I turned off the shower, and walked to the door, and opened it to see crying Zayn. Also only on his boxers. I smiled at him weakly. He didn't smile, he just wiped his cheeks. And sniffed. Aw, he's so adorable. I saw him looking me from up to down, noticing I were in my boxers in the shower. Well I just sat there, but I guess he kind of knew that already. And I were fully aware that you could see through my boxers, but right now I didn't care, and hey, we had sex last night, so this isn't intimate at all. 

Zayn frowned his brows before pulling me into a hug. "Zayn, you're getting wet." 

"I don't care." He shook his head. I hugged him back, wrapping my arms around his waist, and he wrapped his arms tighter around mine. "I'm sorry." 

"I know, me too." I nod. 

"I love you, so much, Liam." He whined, his tears dripping to my shoulder. 

"I love you too, Zayn." I admitted, butterflies in flying in my stomach for some odd reason. I sighed. "Uh, I should probably take a shower now, without boxers. Haha." I said and he froced a smile and pretend to chuckle. I shrugged it off and went back to the bathroom. OK, this day is the most weird day I've ever had. 

I think I'm in love with my best friend. 

~~*~~ 

After I took a shower, I returned to my bed and Zayn were already in his, playing with his phone, looking so adorable. I changed into jeans and white long sleeved t-shirt. I jumped next to him, and pulled him into a hug. I need a hug. I really need a hug. 

"Why did ya hug me?" He asked, hugging me back. I sighed loudly. 

"I guess I just needed a hug." I admit and he squeezes me tighter. Yeah, definitely in love with him. Oh my god, what did I do? I'm in love with Zayn.. I can't go to Connor's and have sex with him, when probably all I could think about is gonna be Zayn. I just can't. I wanna spend my day with Zayn, and find out if I'm truly in love with him. I pulled away. 

"It's 5pm, you should start getting ready." Zayn said. And for my surprise, he didn't sound happy or supportive. 

"Uh, yeah, about that.. I don't think I wanna go anymore." I said and sat next to him. 

"Why not?" He looked at me, with widen eyes. "If you love him, it's the right thing to do."

"Yeah, it's right, just not right now." I said back and he frowned his brows. 

"Then when?"

"Later, maybe not ever. I don't feel the utter joy when he calls me. And you see me jumping around, getting ready to go to his place?" I asked, and he shook his head slowly. "Exactly. I think I'm only with him, because I sort of feel like I need to." 

"Alright, well if you're not gonna go to Connor's should you call him and tell him that you'll just hang some other time?" 

"Nah.." I shrugged. "He has humiliated me many times, and pissed me off many times, and just he's unfair towards me. I can't tell you how much satisfaction I would get, knowing how he'd wait me there. Ready to fuck me, but I never arrive." I said and smiled eavily. 

"Well, aren't you bad." Zayn chuckled. 

"Yeah, I think this was it. Like, when he calls me later tonight, asking where I am. I think I'm gonna break up with him, for good." I say and Zayn's eyes lit up for half a second. 

"Are you serious?" He asked. "For good?"

"Yeah, for good." 

"Thank God, I hated that jerk!" He laughed. I laughed little bit too. "Finally you realize that you could do so much better than him, he doesn't even deserve to be with someone as amazing as you." Zayn says and caress my cheek. Then his eyes widened, and blush crept up to his cheeks. 

"What now, Zee?"

"If you're not gonna go to his place, and you think you're gonna break up with him.. That means that, last night.." He stopped himself

"What about last night, Zayn?"

"We did it, for nothing." He sounded ashamed

"No, we didn't.. You prepared me for my 'first time', which wont be my real first time, but first time with my real boyfriend. So that I can be ready." 

"I'm happy to hear that you're not mad at me."

"I wouldn't get mad at you for helping your best friend out. And about what I said earlier this morning, about the sex being bad.."I started but blushed.. I bit my lip. "I lied." Zayn broke into huge smile, blush tugging onto his own cheeks as well. 

"Oh.." 

"Yeah, it was nice actually. Thanks, Zayn. For everything." I say "And I'm sorry."

"For what?"

"For yelling at you earlier. And for last night. What we did, did kind of happened for nothing. But we didn't happen for nothing. I mean, I wanted to do it with Connor last night. But when he called me this morning, I just.. I don't know, something in his voice told me that I can do so much better than him. So, no, I don't want to anymore." I said and he nodded. 

"Yeah, I get it. I totally get it." Zayn says. "But what about we go clubbing, and you loosen up a little bit?" 

"Yeah, sounds good. You go find yourself a girl, and I'll try to have some fun, and if I see a good looking guy, I could go talk to him." I say and Zayn grins. 

"That's the spirit!" He chuckles and gets up from the bed and goes to his drawer. He takes out black jeans and a white thight tank top. He pulls off his sweatpants, and oh god he has white tight boxers, showing the outline of his cock through the material. Ok, not something I need right now. I turned away, and walked to my bed. I had jeans and white long sleeved t-shirt. Maybe I should change into red one. Yes. 

I went to my drawer, and pulled out burgundy long sleeved t-shirt, thight one, and pulled my white one off of me. Then took the burgundy and pulled it over my head. I turned to see Zayn sitting on the bed. I blushed, did he just see me without a shirt? Not that he'd like what he sees, but just thinking.. 

"You ready?" He asks and I nod. "Perfect! Oh, and you look hot.”

"Oh shut up!" I said and shoved him against the dorm door before stepping out. He followed me and closed the door. 

~~*~~ 

"Are you enjoying yourself so far?" Zayn slurs at me. Yup, he's wasted. I'm probably 40% drunk or so. 

"Yeah, I am. Are you?" I ask

"Yeah, there was this girl--Or was it a guy, I don't know.. Anyways!! He or she came to talk to me and asked if I wanted to dance. I said yes” he tried to explain "Ok, lets get you another drink. You're rather boring company now, Li." Zayn says and grabs my arm before pulling me towards the bar. 

~~*~~ 

After many shots and whatever I were completely drunk. I had my head spinning around, and all I knew was that I felt some guy grinding on my bum, and girl grinding her ass on my crotch. And saying that I were aroused would be understatement.  
I might have had sex last night for the first time, but I loved it and I wouldn't complain it happening again tonight. 

I pushed the girl away and turned to see the guy, and my heart jumped to my throat when I saw who it was. Connor. 

"Miss me?" He asked, and winked his eye before kissing me. I pulled away, only to look at him again. 

"What you doing here?"

"Well, thought I'd have some fun here." He winked his eye. He leaned closer, and I smelled alcohol, god he's drunk too. I let him kiss me, and I kissed him back.  
Next thing I noticed was that he had me pinned against the wall and him, and he was rubbing our crotches together, and exploring every inch of my mouth, while having me moaning into his mouth. 

"Should we take this to somewhere else?" He asked, and before I could answer no or yes, he were already pulling me upstairs. He tried few doors, but they were all locked. Then he found a room, which was open. He pushed it open and pinned me against the wall again.  
He attached my neck with his lips, while undoing my pants. He ripped the belt away and tossed it to the bed, and then grabbed the hem of my shirt and pulled my shirt over my head. I saw him checking me out, and licking and biting his lips. 

"You're so hot, babe.." He whispered biting on my earlobe. "You have no idea how long I've been graving for you.. Well not for long to be honest, just this day. But before yesterday, I had been graving for you for three years.. Oh god that day when--" I cut Connor off with my lips. 

"Shut up and love my body." I said and kissed him. 

"Just don't hate me afterwards, you wanted this to happen too, right?" 

"Yes, Connor. I'm horny, just fuck me.." I slurred and he frowned his brows. 

"Connor?" 

"Yes, I said Connor, now please fuck me.." I said and he chuckled. 

"As you wish.." He said before kissing my neck again. 

He lifted me up, so I were sitting on his hands and carried me to the bed. He hovered on top of me, and attached my neck again. Biting and kissing, and licking. My jawline, kissing every inch. And then collarbone, he kitten licked, and then nibbled on it. 

I felt my erection growing and pulled off my jeans. He pulled off his shirt and jeans too. We were only on our boxers now. Maybe this should happen. So he would shut up about the sex, and I could dump him tomorrow, with hangover of course. He kissed my lips, and I kissed him back. 

~~*~~ 

The next morning finally came, and I woke up as I heard someone yelling downstairs. I slowly opened my eyes, and glanced around the room. Where the hell am I? This certainly isn't my room. Fuck, did I..? Did it happen last night? Did I really have sex with Connor?  
I glanced next to me, to find a naked person under the blankets. Yes, I guess I did. I tried to move a little bit, but my ass was on fire and my head hurt like hell. I touched my forehead and rubbed it and groaned because hell it hurts. I felt the bed move, and I turned to see if Connor was waking up. 

And yeah, he was, but there was a slight thing.. It wasn't Connor. 

It was Zayn. 

My heart stopped when he turned around, but didn't wake up. Well. And what he had said, it was Zayn, not Connor.. 

I had sex with Zayn last night. Again. Oh God, what the hell am I gonna do? But wait... All the things Zayn had said.. About graving me for three years? Did he really mean them? NO, HE DIDN'T, STOP HOPING FOR SOMETHING TO HAPPEN, LIAM.  
I shook Zayn little bit. Maybe there is an explanation to this, maybe I did have sex with Connor and Zayn had just came here. Or maybe it was threesome or I don't know.. Anything but this. 

"What?" He hissed as he rubbed his eyes. He opened them and his eyes met mine. He stared at me, for a second or two but then his eyes widened and he sat up. But hissed immediately at how fast he had moved. "Fuck! It hurts!" He cursed and rubbed his head. 

"Tell me about it." 

"Liam.. Did we just... Did we do it again?" He asked, and bit his lip turning to see me. 

"I think so." I said, eyeing his reaction. It wasn't bad but.. 

"About the things I said last night--" I cut him off

"It's fine Zayn, already forgotten." 

"Oh, well I wanted to talk about them." He said and I nodded. "I, uh, well I just wanted to say Im sorry. Im sorry it happened and Im sorry about what I said last night." 

"Well, since you were doing me, I think it was partly my fault too." I said and he smirked little bit. 

"You're right, but--"

"And sorry because I called you Connor. I were totally convinced that you were him. Like, I saw his face and heard his voice. But occasionally I heard you and.. I dont know, I just..Sorry." I stammered

"It's fine, and I know you'd much rather have sex with someone else than your best friend." he fiddled with his fingers

"What about you?! You do vagina, not dick." I exclaimed and he chuckled

"Which is ironic because my first two times has been with boy." He said

~~*~~ 

After we had came back to our dorm, the awkwardness had gone away. Well, almost completely.. There still was something, but it wasn't noticeable..  
I were just about to sit down on my bed when my phone rang. I groaned out loud, and took it, checking who was calling. Connor. I picked up the phone after ten seconds. 

"Hello, Connor." I said and Zayn's head popped up. His eyes filled with anger and his teeth bite onto each others. I heard him groaning through his gritted teeths. 

"Hello?! Is that all you gotta say?! You motherfucking piece of trash, let me waiting you all night yesterday! I had made everything look good! I had candles, I had dinner, I had movie and I had myself. All you had to bring was your sexy self. And you didn't bring that, why?? You lied to me, Liam! Why didn't you come?" He shouted

"Connor, calm down. I, uh.. I completely forgot after doing my homeworks.. I did them, and then I was tired and decided I'd watch a movie with Zayn, but I couldn't even finish the movie because I were so tired I fell asleep during it. Zayn can witness, right Zayn?" I asked and Zayn mumbled 'yeah'. "You heard that?"

"I heard, but he is your best friend. That doesn't mean I can trust him. In fact, I don't trust him. And right now I don't pretty much trust you either, Liam. You seduced me, and you used me. You lied to me, Liam. It fucking hurt, and I hope you get everything misarble, life has for you."Connor said before ending the phone call. 

"Connor? Hello...? Connor?!" I exclaimed and threw my phone to the wall, making it crash into pieces. Zayn ran to me. 

"Wow wow wow, babe, what's wrong?" He asked

"Uh, I don't know.. He ended the phone call. I don't know if he broke up with me or not, but he said that he doesn't trust me and that he wishes me everything misarble life has for me." 

"What? That little piece of shit!" Zayn hissed 

"It's ok, I'm not mad at him." I said and he frowned his brows at me. 

"How come?"

"If he broke up with me, he did actually a favour. Now I don't have to break up with him." I giggled and Zayn smiled before pulling me into his arms. 

~~*~~

* Two months later*

I woke up when the alarm woke me up for school, it was 7am, and ugh, I hate school. I got up from bed, and got new pairs of boxers and jeans. Phew, maybe I wont feel bad today morning. Because I've been feeling ill for the past few mornings, I think I got a flue or something. I've also had a sore throat last week, so maybe.  
I was just about to go and wake Zayn, but I felt ill again. I ran to the bathroom and to the toilet and threw up. 

"Uhmf!!" Oh fuck, not again. I heard a knock on the door, fuck, Zayn. I can't have him mothering over me. 

"Li, you ok in there?"

"Uh, y-yeah, I just fell." I lied. 

"Oh, ok then." He said and disappeard. I wiped my mouth and drank water from the tap before taking a quick shower and changing clothes. 

"Hey, Li. We have Healt for first class today. Are you ready?"

"Aye Aye Captain!" I exclaimed and he chuckled before vanishing to the toilet. 

After he had returned, we walked out of that dorm with our clothes on and books in our hands and phones in our pockets. I felt ill again, but refused to vomit here. So, I sucked it up.  
We walked to Health class, and I looked at the blackboard. 'Coitus and pregnancy'.. I groaned and shoved my head into my hands. I have no intention on learning how to make love to the love of your life and get her preggers, when I don't have that choice. Mens can't get pregnant, so I can't make love to the love of my life and get him preggers because that's just impossible. 

"Hello, class! You probably saw the subject of today's Health class! Yes, that's right, today we're talking about pregnancy. And I know that mens cant get pregnant but you boys will knock up some lady and you will need every information you will get. So listen up everybody!" The teacher spoke. 

"What if you're gay?" Someone yelled. A man, that's for sure. 

"Um, what?"

"What if you're gay? You can't get pregnant." 

"Uh, then there is adoption, but we talk about that next Health class. Listen then more carefully if you are gay." The teacher said and Zayn nudged me. 

"You better not be sick next Health class." He winked at me. I shot him a glare, and yawned.

"What's wrong with you? You slept 10 hours, how can you be sleepy?" Zayn whispered over the teacher

"I don't know, I've been really sleepy lately." I said, yawning again. 

"Right.." Zayn frowned his brows. "Oh, it's freezing here. How come it's so fucking cold?" He asked and I smiled and brought him to my arms. 

"I'll keep you warm, Zaynie."

"Ah, Leeyumm, you're always so warm.. Literally always. I love it." He said before cuddling closer to me. 

"AM I INTERRUPTING SOMETHING?!" The teacher yelled at us. 

"Uh, no...?" I asked

"Oh, good, then pay attention." She said before continuing. "OK, so yeah, few ways to know if you're pregnant. Anyone know?" 

"Well, you have the need to pee all the time." Some lady said. "Oh, and you're late. Of your period of course." She continued

"Yes, anything else?" Teach asked. Some guy raised his hand. "Yes, Tobias?"

"You're sleepy all the time." 

"Also true." Teach praised. 

"You get morning sickness. You feel ill, and you throw up often." Someone says. 

"Yes, and something else?" 

"Uh, oversensetive sense of smell." A guy says. 

"That's right.. Ok, so how do you know when you're ge--"

~~*~~ 

"Liam Payne?" The doctor called me, the next day.. I got up and walked to him. "You Liam?"

"Yes, Sir." I nodded and we shook hands. 

"I'm doctor Gilbert, and I will be your doctor today."

"Right, Sir." I said back. 

"Right... This way, Sir." He said back and we walked to his office/room. "What seems to be the problem?"

"This might sound super ridiculous, and I might have gone crazy. But I think I need ultrasound scan." I said fiddling with my fingers. 

"What for, Sir?"

"For my belly.. To see if I'm pregnant." 

"Oh, well, lie down and lift your shirt." He said before going through his stuff. 

What? He doesn't think I'm nutz? After few minutes, he came back with this controller and something inside this bottle. He popped it open and poured some to my belly, and rubbed it all the way.  
"This might be little cold." He warned afterwards. 

How nice of him. 

He put the controller to my belly and fiddling through. Everywhere. There was this screen next to him, and he carefully watched it, as he drove all around my belly with that little controller. I wasn't too sure if I saw something or not. I could be mistaken or not. But I have to wait to hear what he has to say. I really really hope, I'm mistaken. 

"Mr.Payne, I have some news for you." He said after taking the controller of and throwing it away, and handing me some paper. I wiped my belly and fixed with shirt. 

"Tell me, Sir." I said

"There is little baby growing inside of you." He talked and my whole world stopped.. He couldn't of have just said that, right? I heard wrong, right?

"W-What?! So, I'm.. really...pregnant?" I whispered the last part, even tho no one could hear me. 

"Yes, Mr.Payne, you are pregnant." He spoke. I nodded before he went to print ultrasound pictures. Five copies. 

I couldn't do abortion anymore, and even if I would be able to do it, I don't think I could do it, you know.. Kill another person. Just no.. 

"Sir, here's your ultra sound copies. I'll be expecting you later, to check everything's ok with the baby." Dr.Gilbert said as he came back and handed me the ultrasound copies after he came back. 

"Alright"I nodded and took them, and then we shook hands and I left. 

~~*~~

As I walked inside me and Zayn's dorm, I were tackeled instantly by my insane best friend into the wall. He had me pinned against it, his legs between mines, and his hands on both sides of my face, and his face only few inches away from mine. 

"Where the hell were you?!" He shouted. "You were gone all night, you were gone all day. And you don't call or text me. I called and texted you thousand times, I even asked Connor if you were there and he said you weren't. Liam where the hell were you?!" 

Oh yeah, Connor. So it turned out we didn't break up. I couldn't bring myself to break up with him, because everytime I start off saying that we need to talk. He agrees but talks over me saying how much he's sorry for the way he's been acting and how much he loves me.  
Then I just end up saying that I love him too, and he kisses me and we cuddle and don't break up. It's always like that. 

I think I still love him, but not as much as before. I think it's more as in brotherly love towards him. Like I care about him, very very much, and I don't wanna hurt him. But when he's a dick towards me, he always hits me. Like he's not drunk, but he hits me. Literally. My face. Or slaps my bum, ok that I can handle. But he hits me. Not punch me, but hits me. Like...A slap to my face. 

I should tell Zayn, but all he would do is beat the shit out of Connor, and I don't want that to happen. And speaking of Zayn, I think I'm still having feelings towards him. Like for example now, having his face this close to me, is like a dream come true. All I can think about is how amazing it would feel if I would just close the gap between us and kiss him. But I can't do that. 

Because he's straight, and I'm with Connor. 

"Liam?”

"I'm so sorry..." I didn't notice I had tears streaming down my face before I felt them. "I didn't mean to not tell you. But I-I..." I burst out crying even more and Zayn's hard face turns into worried brother. He looked adorable. 

"Liam.. I--" He couldn't get anything out of him. "I'm so sorry, I didn't mean to make you cry. I'm so sorry, Liam." He said and I didn't answer him. I just continued crying. I cover my face with my hands and cried into my hands. "Liam, please, stop crying... It breaks my heart to see you cry." He says. 

"I'm sorry, I d-didn't mean to b-break y-your h-heart, Z-Zayn." I stammererd through the sobs. He leaned closer so we were few inches away again, and removed my hands from my face and placed his owns on my cheeks. I locked our eyes and he sends me a weak smile. I didn't return it tho. He cupped my cheeks and wiped the tears away. He smiled weakly at me again. I returned the favor this time, and smiled weakly back. His smile grew bigger and he saw me smiling. 

"Come here." He mumbled and pulled me inside his arms. I squeezed him tightly, like never letting go. And he squeezed me back, with the exact same force. 

"Don't let me go." I said, as in afraid that he'd do such a thing. 

"I wont, Liam. Never. I promise." He spoke quietly and still hugged me. 

We hugged there for at least five minutes, just staying there, standing there. Hugging each others. I cried for about one minute. But then I calmed down, as Zayn caressed my back with his hand. I've never felt so safe, literally.  
He pulled away eventually, but I pulled him back and hugged him again. He chuckled little, and I giggled into his neck. I squeezed him tightly once again as he wrapped his arms around me. 

"You said you won't let me go." I said and he chuckled. 

"I didn't mean it literally, Liam." 

"I know, Zayn. I just.. I just really need a hug right now." I said and kissed his neck. 

He hummed 'alright', or something familiar to that. And I kissed his neck again, and again, and again. Leaving very tender kisses to his neck. As in saying 'thank you for always being there for me.', and I could swear I heard him leaving few sighs and lean his head little bit back. I didn't mind the warning inside my head, that I should stop. I just kept kissing. I pulled away from the hug, only to be able to push him against the wall and attached his neck again. I kissed his jawline, and gently nibbled on it. He leaned his head back, and his hands slithered to my bum and squeezed a little. Gasp left my mouth, but I kept on pleasuring him. I turned to his collarbone and nibbled on that. He let gasp leave his mouth, and he squeezed my bum in return again, making me moan against his skin. 

His hands left my bum and slithered to the hem of my shirt, and tugged on it. I gasped and quickly pulled away. Our eyes locked, his hands still on the hem of my shirt and something in his eyes. I licked my lips, and breathed heavily. Our eyes still locking. He slightly nodded, I almost missed it, but I'm glad I didn't. I nodded back and he smiled before closing the gap between our faces by kissing me. I wrapped my hands around his neck, and pulled him closer. He undid the zipper on my hoodie and our kiss broke for few seconds when I took it off and dropped to the floor. 

He undid his and tossed it away too. Our lips met again, and he started walking us to his bed and gently laid me down, before hovering on top of me. Our lips moved perfectly in sync, and I never wanted to stop kissing him. His lips left mine, and attached my neck. He made sure not to go too roughly or hurt me, he were gentle. He placed gentle and loving kisses everywhere and undid the button on my jeans and undid the zipper. Before pulling away from the kiss and pulling them jeans slowly down. Kissing my body at the same time. I leaned my head back and ran my fingers through my hair, soft gasps leaving my mouth.  
His lips met mines again, and captured them slowly between his. I crossed my legs around his waist, behind his bum and squeezed his pelvis, kissing him back with the same force. He hummed into the kiss, and ran his fingers through my hair. 

"Z-Zayn.." I stuttered but he ignored my whimper. He pulled away from me and pulled off my t-shirt, and then his before standing up and quickly pulling off of his jeans. I gulped when hovered on top of me again. We were both just on our boxers, and frankly I loved it. I loved every second of it. 

"Wow, Liam, have you gained weight?" He said, placing his hands on my stomach. I gasped and sat up. Reality hitting me hardly to my face. "What? I didn't mean it like that.. I just.. You look just a tiny bit chubbier around the stomach, than the last time we--" I cut him off

"YEAH IT GOT IT!!?!" I hissed at him. His eyes widened and he frowned his brows. 

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean it like that. I'm sorry Liam." He said

"Just forget it!" I hissed again, and got up and got my clothes and stormed to the bathroom, with a hard on. OK, why did he need to just say that? Can he already see the change on my tummy?! I just found out I'm pregnant today, and he saw my tummy. Oh my god.. I can't believe I'm pregnant. Like I can't be.. I'm a boy. I'm just 19 year old boy, pregnant.  
I heard Zayn knocking on the bathroom door. I didn't answer or anything. I didn't say anything, nor did I open the door. I'm so not opening the door to him! I have no rights to be mad at him, but I am. 

"Liam, come on. At least come out. I need to see you." He spoke. "Please." He added

"Leave me alone!" I growled

"What is wrong with you? First you cry and then you say you need a hug. Now you just.. I dont know.. I don't know what happened.." He mumbled

"You called me fat, that's what happened. You don't know what's wrong with me, and you just called me fat." 

"No, Liam. I didn't mean you're fat, because you're not. You're still skinny, you just look like you've eaten a big meal today. That's all. And maybe you did, maybe you ate big meal today and it will go away tomorrow." 

"I wish it would.." I mumled

"What?"

"Nothing."

"OK, Liam, just open the god damn door!!?" He growled banging the door. "Because if you wont, I will wait here until you do. And I promise you that." He said, and I heard him sitting down on the floor. 

~~*~~ 

Ok so it turned out that I didn't come out. And he spend the whole evening and night sitting there against the door, me sitting on the other side of the door. I appreciate the effort, but I'm still mad. Well I'm not mad anymore, but I were mad the next day.  
Now it's been two days since that day, and we're ok now. I didn't apologize but neither did he. I just kinda talked to him, and I saw the relief on his face, and he started talking to me back and then I forgot I were mad and ever since we've been all touchy and best friends again. 

"Liam, are you coming to the new club with me, Louis, and few other friends?" Zayn asks as we walk back to our dorm from the last class of this day. 

"Uh, what are we gonna do at the club?" 

"I don't know...? Drink? Get drunk? Hook up with someone maybe, depends a little.." He shrugs

"Uh, I don't think so.." I say.. If I really am pregnant (which I am), I can't drink alchohol. Or coffee, or smoke a ciggy.. 

"Come on, why not?" He asks

"Um, I don't feel like getting drunk right now.." I say and he shakes his head in disbelieve. 

"I don't get you Liam.. You're so.... different. I don't what it is about you, but you've changed."

"Oh, have I now?" I ask

"Yes, you're always moody and you don't drink anymore and you cry a lot and you're just different in every way. I don't know what happened. Was it the.... Sex?" 

"What? No! It's not that Zayn, I just.. I've changed. I don't know wether it's good or bad, but I have. If you don't like the new me, then it's a shame.. Because this is who I am now..." I said. 

"At least the next 7 months" I mumbled the last part and he frowned his brows. Shit he heard?

"What? What you mean seven months?"

"Ugh, nothing, Zayn.. Forget it." I say before jumping to my bed. 

~~*~~ 

It was friday when zayn asked me to go clubbing with him and his friends. I said no and stayed at home. And it wasn't until few hours when he came home filthy drunk. His walking was funny, and it wasn't more than few seconds when Connor came behind him, 50% drunk. Oh god.. 

I got up from my bed and faced the two. "Uh, h-hi?" I stuttered and they both smirked at me. Then looked at each others, before smirking again. 

"Hi, beautiful.." Zayn said walking towards me. 

"Hey, babe." Connor said and took my hand in his. 

He walked me to my bed and we both sat down. Zayn sat on the other side, also next to me. I quickly looked at him, and he was smirking and biting his lips. I then looked back at Connor. 

"What would you say, if the three of us had some good time?" He asked, and oh my god. Did he just suggest what I think he did? Threesome with me, Connor and Zayn. 

EW NO. 

"What?" I asked, wanting to be sure. 

"Yeah babe, like you, me and your boyfriend. Like what would you say if we would like.. make you feel good, and in the progress we would feel good too?" Zayn asked this time. 

I gulped, and tried to search for something from his eyes. Everything I could see tho, were lust and drunkess. Complete drunkness. He was waisted. 

"Uh.. I-I, I think I w-wouldn't mind." I said. Oh my god, why did I just say that? Zayn smirked and I turned to see Connor, he was happy too. The two of them exchanged looks before nodding. They got up from the bed and faced each others. 

"Ok, so.. What if we showed you how it's done and then I could kiss you and then you could kiss Zayn? And then less clothes." Connor said as he looked at me. I nodded. He and Zayn closed the gap between their faces and kissed. My mouth dropped. NO WAY!? They're kissing. Now they're sucking each other's faces off. Omg. This is not hot at all. I don't want Zayn to kiss Connor. I don't want him to kiss anyone else but me. Ugh, no... JUST NO, BIG GAY NO NO!! 

They stopped after few minutes and Connor approached me, and kissed me roughly. Our lips moved in sync, and I felt someone pulling Connor away, and then I felt a pair of another lips on mine. 

Zayn. 

Oh my god, like really.. His lips feel amazing. I cupped his cheeks, and kissed him back, harder. Connor started to pull down Zayn's pants from behind, only to leave him on boxers. Zayn shoved his tongue inside my mouth, and I rubbed our tongues together. He hovered on top of me on the bed and I moaned slightly. He rubbed our clothed crotches together, getting mighty groan from me. 

Connor pulled Zayn away from me, and growled before kissing Zayn ever so roughly. I saw that Zayn really didn't wanna kiss him, but kissed him anyway. After few minutes of sloppy and horny kisses, Zayn turned to me. 

"Clothes off." He glanced at Connor before turning back to me, smirking. "All of it." I gulped and nodded. I started undoing my clothes at the same time as they did. And before I realized, I were nude and so were they. 

"OK, what do we do?" Connor asked. Zayn shrugged. "Ok, how about, I fuck Liam, and Liam fucks you?" 

"What?!" I screamed out

"Sounds good to me." Zayn smirked, and licked his lips. "Really good." He chuckled

"What? Zayn, but you're not gay... I'm not gonna fuck you." I stammered

"Liam, honey. I'm 100% gay. I lost my virgnity to a boy, and then my second time were with a boy too. And everytime I'm drunk, like right now, I end up either making out or having sex with another boy. I never have anything like this with girls. Sober or drunk. You should know better, you've known me almost for 19 years." Zayn spoke

"Uh, yeah, I just didn't think about it." 

"Oh, well, let's get to it, shall we?" Connor smirked and Zayn nodded. Zayn laid down on the bed, and this smirk never left his face. "Ok, Liam, you know you will have to get in there eventually, don't you?" 

"Uh, y-yeah, I know.." I said, shaking, and slowly walking towards Zayn. He were lying on my bed. Damn it, always my bed. 

"I bet you fuck better than I do." He whispered to my ear so Connor wouldn't hear. I hovered on top of him, and bit my lip. 

"Shut up, you idiot." I mumbled through my gritted teeth. He smirked. 

"Just fuck me, best friend." He bit his lip and leaned his head down. "Rough and dry." He said  
I lined up against his entrance and pushed in, as he spread his legs wider. This was all so weird, and I had no idea what to do. But, strangely, it were so hot that I wasn't gonna complain. He gasped when he felt me going in. I pushed in completely, but wanted to wait for Connor to fuck me first. I mean, I wanted us three to fuck at the same time, if you know what I mean? 

"Connor, you idiot, just fuck me." I growled and Zayn chuckled, and caressed my cheek. 

"So beautiful.." He whispered, but only so I heard it and not Connor. 

I felt pair hands on my hips, and then I felt Connor going in. Fuck, it stinged, but he's been waiting for this too long, I couldn't say no. He pushed in completely and I closed my eyes, and bit my lip. Connor started thrusting and it was my cue to thrust too. So I groaned out loud, when Connor started thrusting and I did too. I pulled out of Zayn, only to be able to slam back in. 

"Fuck, fuck, fuck.." Zayn kept saying and I heard Connor groaning behind me. I moaned about how amazing it felt, having someone fucking you behind, at the same time as your fucking someone. I've never felt anything so pleasurable before. 

"Oh, god, Liam, you're so tight.. Just how I imagined." Connor groaned. And I thrusted harder, only to be able to hit Zayn's spot and hear him gasp out. 

"Fuck, Li, do that again!!" He moaned out loud, taking a grasp onto his own cock. He started tugging on it, and I fucked him into the mattress as Connor hit my spot. 

"Umfh!" I let out. "Oh, Connor.” I whimpered

"Oh fuck yes, Liam, I love you so much.. Fuck you're so tight." Connor said, and strangely, I didn't say it back. I just let him fuck me and I fucked Zayn. 

"Fuck, Liam, you're doing so good. You're so good, babe. Ugh, fuck, Liam, I-I, ugh, god, fuck." Zayn said as he clutched onto my shoulders. 

"Li-Liam.." Connor whined. He thrusted and I arched my back, and kept on fucking Zayn. I groaned, and so did Connor and Zayn. We all did. After few moments, I heard Connor gasp and release his shots inside of me. He pulled out and dropped to the bed, next to us. I whined as he did. But kept on fucking Zayn. He grabbed my ass in progress and squeezed it. 

"Liam, y-you're a-amazing.." He moaned out, and I moaned too. Kept hitting his spot, and felt myself on the edge of my climax. 

"You too.." I said and released my shots inside of him, and pulled out.. "You know, I've always wanted to try something." I pointed his red, stiffy cock. I heard him whining and I smirked. 

I crawled closer to his cock, and took it inside my hand and pumped it few times. Just amazed how big he is. I licked the top, and he hissed. I sucked the top, teasingly and covered it with my saliva. He placed his hands on my hair, and massaged. 

"Hmhmh..." I hummed against his cock, sending vibration flash through him. He groaned and I bet he loved it. I sucked harder, and faster and he tugged harshly onto my hair before releasing shots into my mouth. I swallowed, it because I didn't know what else to do.. The taste it wasn't the best, but the look on Zayn's face made me forget it completely.  
I dropped on the bed, between Connor and Zayn. I wanted to sleep, because I were exhausted as fuck, but I didn't know how. If I should face Connor, or if I should face Zayn. I didn't know how to choose. 

Well, deep down inside me I did, so that's probably why I decided to face Zayn. I turned my back on Connor and pulled up the covers. I felt Connor wrapping his arms around my waist, and Zayn cuddled up closer to me. When he probably thought I were asleep, he pecked my lips. Twice. He pulled away, but leaving only one inch between our faces. I opened my eyes, and met his, his eyes widened a little bit, but softened eventually. I pecked his lips too, slowly, and quickly, but still did. Connor had no idea.  
I pulled away, and smiled at him before closing my eyes and drifting into a peacefull sleep.

~~*~~ 

I woke up, feeling arms around me, and I felt someone in front of me as well.. What is going on? Oh right, yeah, I had threesome with Zayn and Connor last night. I groaned and rubbed my eyes. 

"Liam, fucking stop moving! I'm trying to sleep.." I heard Connor mumbling. I groaned again, and turned around to face Zayn. His eyes were open, but he were thinking something really hard. Well probably last night. 

"I'm sorry." He whispered and closed his eyes. I sighed and quickly kissed his cheek. His eyes fluttered open. "What was that about?" 

"You don't need to apologize." I said shrugging. "You were drunk and we all know what people inted to do when they're drunk, right?"

"Have sex?"

"Hah, well, Zayn.. I meant more like stupid things, but yes, sex is usually one of them." 

"But sex isn't stupid, sex feels amazing." He says and bites his lip. 

"Yeah, but having sex with someone they're not suppose to have sex with, is stupid. And we have been stupid for three times." I confessed, feeling my cheeks burning up. 

"Oh, yeah, we have, haven't we." Zayn said and I nodded. "Well I'm sorry." 

"Don't apologize Zayn."

"Why?"

"Well firstly, people inted to do stupid things when they're drunk." I repeated myself and Zayn smirked. "And because it was freaking amazing.." I confessed blushing. 

"Whaat?" He asked, blush creeping his cheeks too. 

"It was amazing.”

”No matter how good you felt, I don't wanna ruin our friendship over something as stupid as sex." He spoke and I nodded. 

"I know, me neither." I then remembered what was really going on.. I'm pregnant. My smile has been totally whiped off of my face, and worry took it's place. Zayn frowned his brows. 

"What now?" He asked

"Uh, n-nothing.. I just remembered, I promised Harry I'd see him today.." I said and got up from the bed and put on some boxers and sweatpants, and t-shirt and shoes and my phone before running out of that dorm. 

*Quick sneek peek of Zayn's POV.*

Liam left the dorm and slammed the dorm door shut.. I groaned, jealousy hitting me. He's spending his day with Harry, and he left me here in this bed with his boyfriend Connor. 

Ew no. 

"You know it's pretty obvious." He spoke

"Excuse me?" I asked, shit I didn't know Connor were awake.

"Your hopeless crush towards him." He paused. "I bet you're even in love with him." 

"I'm not." I whispered, lowering my head. 

"Why can't you look at me then?" He asked and I looked at him. "Now tell me you're not in love with your best friend." 

"I-I, I can't.." I said biting my lip harshly. I really were in love with Liam. Have been for three years now. Ever since the car accident Liam was in.

"I knew it. And I hate to admit it. But from the looks of it, seems like he's in love with you too." Connor said. 

"Ugh, no he's not.. He has never looked at me like he used to look at you." 

"Yes, used to. I know he fell out of love with me ages ago. I just love him so much, I never wanted to leave him. You have no idea how much I love him. He's so precious to me, and I've never seen anyone so deligate before. He's truly beautiful and I do wish he would still love me. But I understand why he doesn't. I can be pretty possessive, and agressive. And I've been hitting him..." He lowered his head

"WHAT?!" I got up from the bed. Very sure I had nothing on me. 

"Please, cover your hoohoo before I attack you with blowjob." He chuckled. I groaned in disgust and put on some boxers. 

"Now, what did you just say? You've been hitting him?"

"Only when I'm drunk or when I'm pissed. I always regret it after, and he says it's fine.. So I shrug it off. But I can tell he's not ok with it. I can just tell.." He speaks, tears streaming down his face. 

"What?"

"I can't blame him from falling out of love with me, but if he did. I'm ok with it.. Just tell him I love him, ok? I don't think I can do this anymore.. I don't think I can live knowing I'm hurting him. Physically or emotionally." He said, and got dressed. "I really hope you two will get together, you would make a great couple." He added

"What are you on about?" I were still confused. 

"To be honest, throughout all this time when me and Liam were together, he never really looked at me how he looked at you. He looks at you with so much love, and with so much passion. He just looked at me because he had to. He could spend his entire life looking at you, and never getting bored. I don't blame him for that either, you are truly beautiful Zayn. And I really understand why he cares about you, a lot.." He said and hugged me quickly. 

"W-What are you doing?"

"Could you pass that hug to Liam? And tell him I'm truly sorry, and that he wont ever have to see me again if he doesn't want to.. But I still love him, and I'm really sorry. But it's over." He smiled. "Bye Zayn." He says before storming out. 

What the hell just happened? 

~~*~~ 

*Back to Liam's POV*  
When I left that dorm, I went to outside the college to cry. To cry because I were so madly in love with Zayn, but he would never love me back. And because I'm still in love with Connor, or at least I think so... But he still keeps abusing me and I can't break up with him. I just can't. 

I took out the ultrasound picture from my phone's side pocket, and looked at it proudly.  
That's my baby. That's my daughter or son. I'm gonna raise this baby well, with or without Zayn or someone else. I'm gonna raise this alone if I have to. But I'm not gonna abandon this baby. Not now, not ever. NEVER. 

I rubbed my belly at the same time as I stared at the picture.  
"Oh wow, did you knock someone up or is that fake?" I heard Harry asking behind me. I gasped and turned around, and shoved the picture to my pocket. 

"Uh, w-what are you talking about?" I stammered and Harry chuckled pointing my pocket. 

"Uh, not exactly.."

"What you mean?"

"I didn't knock anyone up." 

"Who's that then? OH MY GOD!! IS THAT ZAYN'S? DID HE KNOCK SOMEONE UP? That would be more suitable because he's straight, and you're gay so... but omg, is that Zayn's?" He spoke

"Breathe Harry, breathe. And yes, it's Zayn's.." I said slowly. Because yes, it's true. It's Zayn's, but it's mine too.. It's my baby, but it's Zayn's baby too. 

"Who did he knock up?" Harry asked, and I gulped. I handed him the ultrasound picture. 

"Why did you give it to me?"

"Uh, just.. It says the mum's name on it." I whispered, and curled up to a ball. I heard Harry gasp slightly. 

"Oh my god! Liam, what the fuck is this?!" He asked

"The truth." I shook around. 

"Did Zayn knock you up?" He asked, and I nodded, tears streaming down my face. "And he didn't take it well, I assume?" Harry asked

"I haven't told him, yet.." I said, crying harder

"Why not, Liam?"

"I had threesome with Connor and Zayn last night." I breathed out. Harry sat down next to me, and pulled me into a hug. 

"Why?"

"They were both drunk." I explain, and he caresses my hair. 

"Shh.. It's alright, Liam.." He spoke and I cried onto his neck. "When are you gonna tell him, Li?"

"I-I don't know.. When I'm ready, and I'm gonna keep this baby.. Wether he wants to offer a hand or not." 

"I'm so proud of you, Liam. So proud." He said and hugged me tighter. 

"T-Thank you, Harold." I said and he giggled because I called him Harold. 

"You welcome, Li." He answered back. I smiled and hugged him once again. 

~~*~~ 

*Two weeks later*

Do you know what I was greeted with when I came back to our dorm? Zayn and a hug. Which apparently was from Connor. And Zayn needed to tell me that Connor is sorry about everything he has done to me, and that he still loves me but he needs to let me go because he doesn't want to hurt me anymore. 

Ok maybe it was for the best.. Because I don't love him anymore. Ok maybe I do. But it's more like a brotherly love. I love him, as a friend, as a ex-boyfriend. A brother.  
But I'm in love with Zayn, I love him. More than best friend, more than brother. I'm in love with him. 

It has been two weeks since that. And one moment I'm all happy and cheery, and the next moment I'm cranky and angry. But it's just pregnancy hormones. I know it, and I hate it.. Because Zayn doesn't know. He thinks something's wrong with me, and it breaks my heart because it reminds me that something is wrong with me, I'm not normal.  
I'm a man, and I'm pregnant. Male pregnancy isn't real. 

Tho it is. And the love of my life is the father. And I'm the papa/ mama. I'm mum.  
Me and Zayn are gonna have a baby. I'm gonna have a baby with the one I've spend my life for the past 19 years. And if there is any possibility that Zayn would grow feelings for me, I would want to spend the rest of my life with him as well. 

"Liam, are you listening or not?" The teacher asked, snapping her fingers in front of my face.

"Huh? I'm sorry what?" I asked and the class laughed. 

"I guess not.. Are you ok Mr.Payne? You look kinda pale.." She said. 

"Um, not exactly.." I said and looked down at my hands. I feel kinda dizzy. 

"You know I'm a Health teacher, you could tell me what's the matter, Liam?" She spoke and I nodded my head. 

"U-Uh, I feel kinda dizzy.." I said, seeing black and white strikes everywhere. "R-Really dizzy."

"I can see it.. Mr.Payne, have you been eating well lately? Have you been going out? Have you slept well?" 

"None of those." I said and laid on the desk. 

"Well, what if someone accompanied you to the nurse, Liam?" She asked and I nodded. 

"Alright, who wants to?" She asked and I knew that no one were gonna say anything. I've been dick towards Zayn, and he has every right not to be volunteering. But I stood corrected. 

"Me!" He said and rushed towards me. "I can take him, please." Zayn said and Teacher nodded and Zayn took a hold on me. He tried to pull me up, but I couldn't stand on my feet. I fell to the floor and Zayn gasped. "Oh My God! Liam, are you alright?"

"N-No.." I said, rubbing my head. "My head really hurts." 

"Did you hit your head just now?"

"N-No, but i-it really h-hurts.." I spoke and felt my eyes getting closer. 

"Liam don't pass out! I promise to take care of you, just we're gonna take you to the nurse and you can lay down, ok?" Zayn spoke and I nodded. He took a hold on me and carried me in a bridal way. I heard few whistles from the class, and if I would have been able, I would've smiled. He kissed my forehead, to get back to the boys who whistled at us...I think.  
I don't wanna go to the nurse, because I've told her that I'm going through male pregnancy, and what if she asks something when Zayn hears? 

Zayn basically ran towards the nurse and shouted "Help me, something's wrong!" 

"Oh my god, Liam!" She exclaimed. "Put him lay down on that bed." The nurse said before rushing towards it as well. "What happened?"

"Uh, I don't know.. He just started feeling really dizzy and he couldn't walk. He said he hasn't eaten, slept or getting fresh air recently." 

"Liam, I told you it's really important to you right now. You need sleep and food. It's good, for the both of you." She said

"Both of you? What does she mean both?" Zayn asked. I shook my head, not being able to talk right now. I covered my mouth, not wanting to puke. 

"Do you feel sick Liam?" She asked I nodded. She handed me a basket and I lowered my head and threw up to the basket. I saw Zayn flinch. 

After few moments of the throwing up and the nurse holding my head, I were done. Zayn gave me a bottle of water he had taken from the lunch room. Nurse gave the permission.

"Thank Zayn."

"No problem, now can someone tell me what the fuck is going on?" Zayn said harshly. And I closed my eyes, and still laid down. 

"Liam, if you're not gonna tell him. I am. He has every right to hear. And he is your best friend, so he could take care of you.." The nurse, Anne, said. 

"Of course I will, Liam's my best friend and I love him to bits." Zayn said and I felt butterflies in my stomach. But he only loves me as in a friend. 

"Yes, so.. Are you gonna tell him Liam, or can I do the honour?" Anne asked. I really like Anne, she always cares about me. 

"Uh, you tell him.. I can't." I said, tears escaping my eyes. Zayn kneel-ed down next to me. 

"Babe, what's going on? Why are you crying?" 

"Our babe here, is carrying your child." Anne just blurted out.. Wait what? I would've thought that she'd be more subtle. 

"WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY?" Zayn asked as he turned to look Anne, his eyes looked like they were gonna pop out. 

"He's carrying your child." Anne repeated and Zayn turned to see me. I didn't look at him. I just looked away. 

"Is it true?" Zayn asked, and I looked down at my hands, fiddling with my fingers. "Is it true Liam? And look at me!" He said. I didn't look at him, neither did I say anything. I just kept on crying. "Liam, look at me, please.." He begged

"I c-can't.." I mumbled through my sobs. Zayn kneeled down next to me and took a hold on my chin, and pulled my face up. 

"Is it true?" He asked as our eyes locked. His brown eyes, oh god, I'm in love with him. 

"Y-Yeah.." I said, whiping away the tears that were replaced with new ones immediately.

"You sure? Because you did have....you know, with Connor too. That day when you didn't wanna go clubbing with us, you know, the day when we...you know..!" He said and I nodded.

"I know, and I, uh, I were already....then." I said, not saying the word 'pregnant'.. 

"How long have you known?" Zayn asked, his eyes searching mines, but I kept looking away.

"Uh, something like a month or so.." 

"Why didn't you tell me?"

"I wanted to prevent bad reaction." I simply stated and locked our eyes. 

"Is this bad reaction?" He asked, chuckling. I shrugged. "Well, Liam, let me tell you.. This is not a bad reaction." He smiled and I frowned my brows. 

"Wait, what? You're not...You're not mad?" 

"Definitely not, why would I be? You're carrying my child, and I love kids.. Why would I be mad over something neither of us planned?" He simply stated. 

"Well, firstly, we're only 19 years old, and we're both boys. We're best friends. You're straight. Again, we're best friends. And I didn't knew I could do this... Because I'm a boy, and.. You probably want kids with your future wife. Instead of that, your first kid is with the one you've known your entire life, which usually would sound romantic, but I'm a guy, and I'm your best friend. It's not exactly a dream family.." I said

"Hey, look at me." He exclaimed and cupped my cheeks and turned me so I faced him and our eyes locked. "You're my best friend. You're gonna make an excellent mother, or father, whatever to this kid. And if you want to, I can be the other mother or father whatever. And we can raise the baby together.. Because it would be my responsibility, and I would be honoured to do so." 

"I would love that." I said, in relief. He smiled before hugging me. I pulled away and faced Anne. "Thank you Anne." 

"Anytime Liam, and as I can see, you have someone who will take care of you from now on... So, I guess you won't be visiting me as often, right?"

"Unfortunately no, but I will visit you, don't worry Anne." I smiled and gave her peck on the cheek. 

"Will you be ok to walk now?" She asked and I nodded. "You should go to sleep, skip the rest day off school, and you too Zayn. You have a father and a child to take care of." Anne says and Zayn just smiles widely and nods. Frankly, I've never seen Zayn this happy before. 

"I will always take care of him." He informed before helping me to my legs and we left the room.  
~~*~~ 

We reached our dorm and I laid down on my bed and Zayn rushed towards me, and sat down next to me. 

"You need anything?" 

"No.." I shook my head. "Just you." I said and opened my arms. He cuddled closer to me and smiled into my neck. 

"I love you." 

"I love you too, Zayn." 

"Why did you think I would get mad at you?" 

"Uh, maybe you didn't wanna have a kid with another boy." I chuckled. 

"A kid is a kid, Liam. It's beautiful thing, and I'm not gonna get mad if someone gives me the greatest gift, I could ever get." He spoke, his big brown eyes shining. 

"You do know that you're probably the best father any child could get, right?" I asked, chuckling. Little bit amazed. 

"Not better than you." He spoke and I drifted into peacefull sleep once again. 

~~*~~  
The next few months were kind of the same. Zayn helped me with everything, and everyone. If someone had a problem with me being pregnant he would beat them up. Or if I needed anything he was there for me, always running towards me with a tray or bandage, or juice or chocolate bar. 

I were now at my sixth month of pregnancy, and everything was great so far. Only one thing I could ask, and that is for me and Zayn to be together. Like together together, kissing, cuddling, saying I love you's to each others. Except we do cuddle, and he says I love you everyday, and I tell him I love him back, everyday. We don't kiss tho, and we're not together. Like together together. 

"Liam, are you alright today?" Mrs.Cowell asks. I nod politely as I walk inside the classroom. Almost everyone are ok with me carrying a child. No one knows whose it is. We haven't told them that it's Zayn's baby. Partly because Zayn doesn't want people to know that he has slept with a man, and also because I don't want to answer people's questions about me sleeping with Zayn. 

Just no. 

We sat down on the chairs and pulled out our History books. Zayn fiddled with his pencil case, and looked utterly adorable. I looked at him having troubles with it, and when he noticed my stare he turned to look at me and I send him a smile. He smiled back sheepishly and rolled his eyes at himself. 

"Does anybody know where we're today?" Mrs.Cowell asks. I raise my hand. "Yes, Mr.Payne"

"Hitler, we're talking about Hitler." 

"Right, thank you Liam." She said back and I nodded once again.

"She loves you, Liam." Zayn whispered into my ear. 

"She does not!" I giggle

"Oh she does, but not in a sugar mama way. Only like a friend. I'd bet my ass you're her favorite student here." Zayn says and I roll my eyes

"You're just saying that because you're jealous she doesn't ignore me." I throw back. 

"Oh, wow. Thanks Liam." He says, playfully slapping my arm. 

"You welcome, babe." 

"Oh, right, yeah, so I'm babe now?" He asks, raising his eyebrow

"Yeah, you've always been my babe. And I'm your babe, right?" I ask, little bit worried he doesn't wanna call me babe anymore. 

"Yeah, you'll always be my babe." He says and kisses my cheek. I blush furiously and hide my cheeks. "No point covering those, I already saw you blushing." He leans closer to whisper into my ear, and whilst pulling away, tugs on my earlobe. I gasp quietly, and he chuckles and crosses his arms over his chest. 

"Zayn..Stop" I plead and he shakes his head, little smirk playing on his lips, and he leans closer again. I place my hands on his chest, in order to push him away but he is stronger and ends up licking my earlobe again. He sucks it and tugs on it as he pulls away. "Z-Zayn.." I whimper out, little bit breathless. 

"Ahem, am I interrupting something?" Mrs.Cowell asks, and both me and Zayn jump up in our seats and look at her. 

"Uh, n-no.." Zayn stammers. I smirk mentally, before shaking my head at Mrs.Cowell. She sends me a suspicious looks before continuing talking to the class. 

"Now look, you almost got us into trouble." I warn Zayn

"You've always known I'm trouble, but you're still here." He informs and I shrug

"I love you for who you are, and the trouble is only exciting." I giggled and he shakes playfully his head and looks at the blackboard. 

After the class, Mrs.Cowell asked me to stay behind. Oh no, is she going to tell me to focus on class? Is she gonna ground me? What does she wanna talk to me about? Oh god, I can already think of the ways she tells me that she has told my parents about me being pregnant. 

"What did you wanna talk about, Mrs.Cowell?" I ask politely as I walk closer to her desk after everyone else had left the room. Zayn said that he'd wait for me in the hallway before going to lunch. So that we could go together, in case someone has a problem with me. 

"Uh, sit down Liam. I need to speak with you." She informed and pointed the chair in front of the teacher's desk. I nodded and sat down. 

"So?"

"Yeah, so, uh.. I know I have no right to ask this, and you don't have to answer if you don't want to. But I've always liked you Liam, and you've always been my favorite student and you've also always been focusing on class. But today was exception. I know that being pregnant can be challenging and I totally understand if you can't attend some of my classes, just tell me and I'll give you my permission to stay in your dorm." She started. 

"I understand." I nod. "What is the question?"

"Yeah, so because I care about you as a friend, and as a student. I was only wondering, if the reason you weren't focusing on class might have been the father of your child?" She said carefully. Not mentioning Zayn's name. Does that mean that she doesn't even mean it?

"Uh, I dont understand."

"You know, Zayn Malik is a great guy. Big hearted, noble, honest, fair, sweet, and probably trustworthy.. And you've been best friends for so long, and I understand if person starts growing feelings towards someone they've known for very long time." She said

"Are you implying that I have feelings towards my best friend?" I ask and she shrugs. "Well in that case, you're right. I might have slight feelings, or huge feelings actually." 

"So, is there any possiblity that he might be the father of the child?" 

"He is." 

"Does that mean he feels the same way?" She asks again. 

"No."

"What you mean?"

"I had very possessive and complicated boyfriend, who wanted to have sex with me. I were a virgin then, and he thought I weren't. Zayn offered a hand and I accepted it. So he helped me through and, I didn't know I could get pregnant so.. We didn't use protection." I say. I didn't wanna tell her that we were partying and Zayn were drunk and so were I, and that we were having drunken sex. Which is never good. 

"Oh, well that is good." She sighs. "I mean that you were both sober, and that you knew what you were both doing at the moment. You're best friends, and you trust each other, and care about each others.. I couldn't imagine a better soulmate." She says

"Oh, well, Zayn's straight.. Except he has told me that he's 100% gay, but he might have been slightly drunk then. But even if he were into boys as well or only into boys, I don't know, he would never go for a guy like me. He only sees me as his best friend, nothing more." 

"Liam, sweetie.. Don't give up now, I mean, you're having a baby together, and you're best friends. And you're attending the same college. There is three reasons you're gonna spend many many years together. Even if it's not like together together. But, I can tell he really cares about you, and he really likes spending time with you." 

"Oh, stop, Mrs.Cowell.. He only protects me and oh, the ear thing earlier, he always does that.. He likes to tease me." I explain, cheeks redding. 

"Have you heard that when a guy has a crush on someone, they always end up teasing them?" She asks and I shake my head. "Well it's true, they like to tease. Like if it would be a guy and a girl, the guy would pull on her braids or if its guy and a guy, the another guy would like sexually tease the other. Just like Zayn teased you today in class." Mrs.Cowell said

"Uh, o-oh.." I stutter, thinking about it. "I guess it could be true, but I still don't know what in earth he would see in me."

"Honey, you are handsome, honest, smart, funny, and you're best friends. I don't know what in earth he wouldn't see in you." She said and I smiled. 

"Thank you, Mrs.Cowell."

"Oh, please, just call me Salma."

"Oh, ok, thanks Salma." I said and she smiled. 

"You welcome, Liam." She said and hugged me slightly. I hugged back before letting go and walking away. 

~~*~~  
*Three months later* 

"Come on!!!!! Hurry you dickhead!!! DRIVE FASTER!!!!! IT'S CLOSE!!!! YOU FUCKING MORAN, JUST FUCKING DRIVE!!!!" Zayn crused as I tried to breathe steadily, and Niall drove, unfortunately not fast enough. 

"Yes, yes, you idiot!!! I'm driving, I'm trying to drive as fast as I can, and don't worry, we're soon there. JUST BREATHE LIAM BREATHE!!" Niall shouted and I nodded, Zayn whiping sweat off of my forehead. 

We arrived to the hospital, and I was put in wheelchair and I got wheel-ed away to private room. Where is Zayn? I can't do this alone.. I just cant'.. OH MY GOD, I CAN'T DO THIS WITHOUT ZAYN!! 

"Ok, Mr.Payne, let's give a birth to your baby!" He informed and I breathed heavily, ok here it goes. I felt Zayn take my hand, and my head snapped at him. 

"Did you really think you're gonna do it on your own?" He smirked and kissed my forehead before leaning closer to me, holding me in his arms gently, ”I'll see you when you wake up.” 

I woke up after the surgery and heard sniffing, I saw Zayn wiping his eyes. 

"Babe, why are you crying?"

"You're so beautiful.." He said, between the sobs. "And that was the most beautiful thing I've ever seen in my entire life. I can't wait to hold our baby in my arms." He spoke and I felt tears in my eyes. He wiped his tears from his cheeks and smiled.

I were breathless, and sweaty and tired. I really wanted to sleep, but even more than that, I wanted to see my baby. 

"He's gonna be ok, Liam.." Zayn whispered to my ear, kissing my cheek. I nodded. 

"I know.. I just.." I couldn't get words out, only sobs came. "I'm sorry."

"Babe, no.. I-I, Liam, why are you crying?" He asked, I only kept crying. "Shit, what do I do? What do I do?" He kept quietly saying. Then I saw something in his eyes, before he quickly leanead closer and pressed his lips against mines. 

I were completely frozen, I had stopped crying but I hadn't started kissing back.. He moved his lips slowly, and I cupped his cheeks, kissing him back. Our lips moved in harmony for few seconds, before he slowly pulled away and planted a gentle kiss on my lips. I couldn't say anything, because I heard the baby scream. They were bringing him to me. I opened my arms, welcoming him. I saw Zayn smiling widely, and I smiled too. 

I held the baby in my arms for probably twenty minutes. Whispering soft I love you's to him every now and then. But then my eyes were starting getting close. I were really tired. Zayn noticed and coughed, probably about to ask if he could hold the baby for the first time, in order to me to get some sleep. 

"Uh, Liam.. Can I-, Can I hold the baby?" He stammered and I nodded. 

"It's yours too, Zayn." 

"Oh, yeah, I know.. Thank you, Liam." He said, and slowly and gently took the baby from me. 

He gasped as he held him in his arms. "Oh hey, baby! It's your papa, yeah, your another papa. That man who just held you in his arms, were your mum /papa, and I'm just your papa. But he loves you so much, and I love you too. I love you so much, baby boy. And I'm never gonna let anyone hurt you or your father." He spoke quietly, and I felt one or two tears sliding out of the corner of my eye. 

"Goodnight Zayn." I whispered and his head snapped up. 

"Night, babe." He kissed my forehead and sat down on the chair next to my bed, holding our little baby boy in his arms, smiling ever so lovingly. I closed my eyes, drifting into peacefull sleep. 

~~*~~ 

When I woke up, I saw Zayn sitting on the same chair, our baby in his arms. I'm coughed and gulped, my mouth dry as fuck. I shifted and Zayn's head popped up. He instantly smiled. Oh, so it really happened. I have a family. 

"Hey, love." He said and I smiled at him and at my baby boy. OUR baby boy. 

"Hey, Zee." I said, I sighed and Zayn nodded and leaned closer to me and pecked my lips, not saying anything. I loved it, spontanious and romantic. He pulled away and I smiled at him weakly and he smiled back. "Hey." I repeated. He giggled and quickly kissed me again before placing the baby in my arms. 

"I'm gonna get you a water from the hallway, you can hold him." He said before storming out of the hospital room I were in at the moment. 

I smiled and looked at Trevor. Or Travis. I don't know. I like Travis more. He has brown eyes, more Zayn's than mines, but his eyebrows are just like mine. Awe, he is adorable as fuck.  
"Hey, baby boy. I don't know what's your name yet, but I promise once your papa comes back. We're gonna decide. I like Travis a lot, but I can't decide anything without your papa. Gosh, baby, I love you so much.." I whispered to him. "And your papa loves you too. I find it really cute that we're best friends. But what he doesn't know, is that I'm madly in love with him. I don't think he feels the same way, which explains why I haven't told him." I said

"Of course I feel the same way." I heard a voice from the door. I looked at Zayn, and immediately started to panic. He heard me? Well who cares? He said he fucking feels the same way. 

"Y-You heard w-what I said?" I stammered

"Yeah, and I do feel the same way, Liam. Don't think that I don't." He says walking closer to me. He took my hand in his and intertwined them. "I'm in love with you, Liam Payne." I felt my breath hitch, and I couldn't get out any words. 

"I-I love you too." I said, and bit my lip. He smiled and his eyes lit up, before slowly leaning closer. Our lips met, and neither of us moved, we were just there. He then moved his little bit, and I did too. I moved my lips with his, and our lips moved slowly, but surely together. Like fitting perfectly together, it was perfect. Just as perfect as I remembered.  
He pulled away and our eyes locked. 

"I love you so much, Liam. Always have, always will." 

"Wait what? Always have?"

"Uh, y-yeah, for few years now.. It's not a big deal." He said, blushing. 

"No, wait.. It is a big deal.. Does this mean that you were in love with me when we... you know? And, when you found out that I were carrying your child?" I asked, and he nodded. 

"Both." 

"Oh, wow.. You mean you liked me when you offered to help me have sex with Connor?" 

"Yes Liam, I did. And just so you know, I loved it. I completely loved it, in a ways I never should have. I loved the sex, it was everything I could have ever imagined. I always wanted to lose my virginity to you. Ever since I knew what virginity meant. I didn't know why I wanted that, but I just did. And when I realized that I were in love with you, I wanted that even more than I used to." He spoke

"Why didn't you ever tell me, Zayn?"

"Well for two reasons.. One; you were with Connor. And two; I were afraid you'd only like me as in a best friend." 

"I think I always liked you. But sadly I only realized it in the morning after our first time." I said and he nodded. 

"It's fine, Liam." He kissed my forehead. 

"You idiot, that's not even a kiss." I scoffed and he giggled before kissing me on the mouth. 

"What would you say if you'd spend the holidays at ours?" Zayn asked, and my mouth dropped. "What? We always whine about how we don't spend christmas together, and now when we have our own little family, my family and your family could spend the christmas together?" 

"Sounds perfect Zayn, but.. I'm not sure if I'm ready to tell my parents that I got pregnant." I said

"Aren't you gonna go home for christmas?"

"Well, mum said that if I really wanna stay christmas here, with you, she'll understand. I mean it's only one christmas and I've got 18 christmas with them. And I'm gonna have more christmas with them, it's not the end of the world if I'm not home." I said and Zayn frowned his brows. 

"Well, it is to me. I wanna go home, but I wanna spend christmast with you, and with Travis." He smiled and my eyes widened

"WHAT?!" 

"I heard that you liked the name just few moments ago, and Travis doesn't sound all too bad." He giggled. "So, I wanna spend time with my family." 

"Ok, but promise me that if my parents get mad or disgusted with me. You'll run away with me?" 

"I'll always run away with you, babe." He said and kissed me quickly. "And besides, spending the holidays together is exactly what I wanna do. I wanna tell my parents."

"About what?"

"About us"

"What part of us?"

"Every part of us, Liam. From the part where I'm in love with you, to the part where I got you pregnant to the part where I'm freaking happy about it." He said, smiling, and caressing my cheekbones. "I mean, look at him. He looks so adorable in your arms." He said and I looked down, at Travis. 

"So, you sure you wanna name him Travis?"

"Yeah, I mean it sounds good. We only have to decide middle name and what about the last name. Which one he gets, or does he get both?"

"I don't know, Zayn.. We can think about that later, alright? Maybe at Christmas, if our parents don't get mad, they can tell us if they have any suggestions. Right?" I said and Zayn nodded. 

"Can't wait 'till christmas." He said. 

"Come on, it's only like a two weeks away." I said

"How did you manage to be home at Summer holidays, without your parents noticing?"

"They were out of town most of the time, and when they were home, I were little bit looser shirts so they didn't notice the difference. I were only like 3 month or so.. So I weren't that big yet." I said and he nodded. 

~~*~~  
Two weeks later, it was 23rd of December. And me and Zayn were leaving home. Like we were in the car. Zayn were driving and I were in the back with the baby. We were playing something music, and humming along and talking about everything. The car drive were something around 5 hours or so.. 

During these two weeks, we've been totally lovey dovey. Zayn's been repeating the words I love you more than I can count, but I'm not complaining. I always say it back and we kiss.  
We haven't had sex tho, I guess it's just not the time.  
I were super nervous the whole car drive, and Zayn kept saying that it's alright. It was 2pm when we were at Zayn's place. And don't worry, our families knew that we were gonna spend christmas together. My mum and dad were gonna come too but not until tomorrow and we were gonna sleep together under the same roof. 

So me and Zayn agreed that we're gonna tell his parents first, and tomorrow to mine.  
Zayn parked the car in front of his house, and got out. He opened the door for me and I took Travis with me and took the diaper bag. Zayn closed the car door and then locked it. We walked slowly towards the door, and just when Zayn were about to knock, it opened. It revealed Zayn's little sister. 

"Zayn! Oh my god, I missed you so much!!" She exclaimed and jumped into Zayn's arms. 

"Oh, Safaa, I missed you too." Zayn laughed and lifted her into his arms, and hugged her before placing her back down and walking inside the house. Me following him. 

"Oh, I did kinda miss you too, Li." Safaa giggled and I smiled. "But, wait, who's that?" She pointed the baby

"Oh, this is Travis." I said  
"Whose baby is it?" She asked and I went completely blank and quiet, I didn't answer, I just smiled and went inside the house after Zayn. 

I walked inside the living room, only to be able to see Zayn hugging and kissing his parents. I smiled at the view, and held Travis tighter in my arms. Don't worry Travis, it's gonna be alright, I thought. But weren't sure it was true. 

"Liam!! I missed you sweeti--" Patricia got cut off when she noticed Travis in my arms. Her smiled disappeard and frowned her brows. Omg, if this is her reaction, what is gonna be my parents'? 

"Hey, Patricia." I said gently and kissed her cheek. She smiled at me, still little confused. 

"Yaser." I nodded and he nodded back, also little confused. 

"Liam, honey, who is this baby?" Trisha asked, now smiling at the brown eyed fellow in my arms. 

"It's mine." Zayn informed behind his parents. 

"I'm an aunt!?" Safaa exclaimed happily and Zayn nodded. 

"That's wonderful, but who is the mother." Trisha asked looking at me. 

"You're looking at him." I quickly said and looked at the floor. Silence fell to the room, and  
Zayn walked next to me. "It's mine, and Zayn's."

"But how is that possible? Neither of you have vagina!" Safaa exclaimed

"Safaa!! Go to your room, we'll call you when you can come down." Yaser said and Safaa ran to her room, pissed. 

"Care to explain this situation, boys?" Trisha said 

"U-Uh, yeah.. I, uh.. I got pregnant, and it's Zayn's." I said and they rolled their eyes

"Something we don't already know. Like when and how? I mean, I knew that Liam could get pregnant but I wanna know wh--" I cut her off

"WHAT THE HELL?! You knew? How in the deepest hell did you know that?" I exclaimed

"Your parents told me when you turned seventeen." Trisha shrugged like it would be the normalest thing ever. 

"What? And no one ever thought it would be a good idea to tell Liam?" Zayn asked, just as surprised as I were. 

"Well, we didn't think he'd be having sex this soon. And it wasn't really our place to be, and even if it would've been, I'd think it's clear that you have safe sex. I mean Zayn!! Didn't you guys use protection??"Yaser asked

"Well, I think that the first time we did use, but the second time, we didn't use did we Zayn?" I asked and Zayn flushed bright red. 

"Um, n-no.." He looked. 

"So.. Care to tell us why you two were having sex? And two times.." Trisha said, crossing her arms around her chest. 

"Aren't you suppose to be straight, Zayn?" Yaser asks. Fire burning inside me... Aren't they ok with him being bisexual?

"I'm bisexual dad, I always were.. And to answer your question mum, we've had sex three times, and first time were to help Liam be ready for his boyfriend Connor. And that was when I had condom, and the second time we were both completely waisted, and it just happened. And the third time when we had threesome with Liam and his now ex boyfriend Connor." 

"Who, btw, dumped me the morning after.. And get this;"I said and pointed the air, and got this stupid face. "He told Zayn to tell me that we're done." 

"Wow." Yaser said. "Ok, I don't know what to say.." 

"Oh, it was the second time when I got pregnant. Because our first time, we used protection, and the third time I were topping. So it wouldn't even have been possible, with or without protection, which we didn't use then." I said and Zayn were redder than he already were. I took his hand.

"And it's not like one of those stories where the baby is an accident, well he is but.. even if it wouldn't have been, I would still be into Liam."

"What? You're into Liam?" I heard voice asking. I turned around and saw Safaa standing there with widen eyes. "Is it true what you said about that baby? Did you got drunken pregnant?"

"Uh, yes, but it was big mistake to get drunk, but I'm happy because it gave me Travis." I said kneeling down next to Safaa. She smiled widely

"So, are you into Liam?" She asked again, looking at Zayn. 

"Oh, sweetie pie. I'm madly in love with him, have been for few years actually." Zayn said, shrugging. I smiled and probably blushed a little bit. Zayn vinked at me and I vinked back. 

"Ok, cut it, boys!" Trisha laughed as he approached me. "I'm happy for you two, anyways." Trisha said and kissed my cheek. 

"Me too, son. Me too." Yaser high-fived with Zayn. I saw Safaa hugging Zayn's leg. Oh, so they're all ok with this.. How nice.. 

"Babe, can I hold Travis for a while?" Zayn asked and I nodded and handed him over, before pressing quick kiss to his lips. 

"Wow, what?!" Trisha asked 

"What you mean what?"I blinked my eyes at her

"You guys just kissed, why did you guys just kiss?" She repeated

"We're together, wasn't that clear already?" Zayn asked and caressed my cheek like he likes to do these days. Travis started crying and Zayn left to change his diapers. 

"So, you like my Zayn?" Trisha asked, Yaser disappearing with Zayn. 

"Uh, y-yeah.. I hope that's not a problem."

"Not at all, I secretly always hoped you two would end up together somehow." She vinked

"You did?" I asked

"Even blind could see that you were perfect for each others. I always wondered if you liked each others, but when Zayn told us he's straight, I felt bit sad because it looked like you were into him." She said

"When?"

"When you guys were fifteen or something like that, I had asked if Zayn cared about you more than just his best friend. And he laughed and just said that he's straight and into girls. I shrugged it off, but then when you were in the car accident, his life was nothing compared to yours in his eyes. He even told me that he'd jump off of a cliff, only to save you. And he said that you're the only one who ever really got him during those years. And that if you died, he'd had no one there for him when he needs someone. I should've noticed the love in his eyes, now I can clearly remember it..." Trisha spoke

"Wow, how can you remember things so well? I barely even remember the whole incident thingy." 

"I observe a lot, Liam.. And if I had known the real story behind those walls that day, maybe I would've told Zayn to confess his feelings towards you earlier and you would be together now. You could have been together for few years if it would have worked out.. I should've noticed..." Trisha kept saying and saying. 

"Trisha.." I took her hand. "Why are you talking like one of us is dead?"

"Because you almost died, and Zayn freaked the hell out, and I did nothing to comfort him. I just said that you were gonna be alright, when he were crying for the love of his life.. If Zayn's dad would've been you, I probably would have jumped off of a cliff." Trisha chuckled. 

"Good thing it wasn't me then." I heard Yaser speaking from the door. Me and Trisha turned our heads and we saw, Travis, Zayn and Yaser leaning against the door and smirking at us. 

"Did you just hear our conversation? Both of you?" I asked and they both nodded. "Oh god, not embarrassing at all.."

"Not at all." Zayn said and I shook my head, walking towards him. 

"I love you honestly." I said and Zayn blinked his eyes, making tears stream down. I did the same, and the same thing happened. 

"Ok, why are we crying? It's Christmas." Zayn giggled and leaned closer to kiss me. I giggled and kissed him back. 

"Let's pretend they're happy tears." I said wrapping my arms around his neck. I heard Yaser and Trisha leaving the kitchen with Travis. Zayn walked us towards me fridge. "Oh, is that so?" I asked vinking my eye at Zayn, and he chuckled before kissing me again. 

"I love you, Liam." He mumbled between the kisses. I smiled widely, so widely that I thought I were gonna break in two. 

"I love you, too, Zayn." 

We kissed again, and he lifted me so I were sitting on their counter and kissed me again, resting his hands on my waist as I had my hands on his cheeks. We kissed and god did we kiss, he were sucking on my bottom lip as I were running my hands through his hair. His parents were in the living room, playing with Safaa and Travis. Totally oblivious, or maybe not.. Zayn lifted his head, and kissed my neck, pulling my body closer to him. I wrapped my legs around his waist, and leaned my head against the cupboards, giving him more space. 

"Z-Zayn.." I whimpered. "Zayn, sh-should we go b-back-k there?" 

"Yeah, but not yet." He said, nibbling on to my earlobe, tugging on it as he whispered hot things into my ear familiar to 'I am gonna wreck you tonight, so badly', and so on and so on. 

"Oh, c-can't wait." I said, lifting his face to connect our lips. He smiled into the kiss, and kissed me once again, very passionately. 

~~*~~  
The night came and we all went to bed, and god did we sleep well. Zayn's parents promised to take care of Travis, so we'd get to sleep tight. I did wake up few times when I heard him screaming but, I fell asleep instantly as I closed my eyes. 

And the next day, 24th of December. When we have our Christmas dinner, and we clean the rest we can. And just hang out and then go to sleep so we get to wake up early to open up the presents and just hang out more.

Zayn did go out, he said he has some things he needs to take care of. And when he came back, he were smiling ever so widely that it spooked me. I asked what happened, but he just shrugged it off and told me that he's gonna explain later.  
It was 4pm currently, and my mum and dad were about to come to Zayn's place. I were stressing my nerves out, but Trisha kept calming me. 

"It's gonna be alright Liam, your parents knew that you could get pregnant.. And when they told me about it, they didn't seem upset, they seemed rather excited. They're gonna be ok with the fact." She said and I nodded, embracing her. 

"Thanks for trying to make me feel better, Trisha." I said and she flashed me a smile pulling away. 

"Is it working?" 

"All good so far.." I giggled and she did too, just as we heard knock on the door. I gasped, and unknowingly took Trisha's hand. I saw Zayn walking towards me with Yaser behind him. They both looked little bit scared. 

"Baby, it's alright." Zayn said kissing my cheek 

"I don't know.. Baby and the dating at the same time, it can be a big shock.." I said and the doorbell rang for the second time. "For god's sake, someone open the damn door!" I hissed and Yaser chuckled before walking to the door. I pulled Zayn into a hug, and squeezed tightly. "I love you." I said pulling away. 

"You too." He said back and Trisha cooed at our cuteness. 

I heard mum and dad greeting Yaser at the door and then Safaa came running downstairs. I heard her laughing and greeting my mum and dad. And my folks greeting her back. I took a deep breathe before walking towards the door. 

"Hey mum, hey dad." I said shyly. Mum gave me a hug and I politely planted a kiss to her neck and hugged my dad after. "You guys look good." 

"Thanks, son. You too." Dad vinked back at me. I heard Zayn coughing behind me and tugging on my arm. 

"Oh, didn't see you there Zayn. Come here, big guy." Mum said and Zayn smiled before embracing her and dad. 

"How are you doing, Zayn?" Dad threw and Zayn nodded

"I'm great Geoff, and you?"

"Same old, same old." 

Zayn's mum came too, with Safaa next to her. "Come on guys, come inside and let's get comfortable." She said and everybody walked to the living room. Me and Zayn sat next to each others, very close to each others. I were practically sitting on top of him, tho there were enough room for me to sit casually next to him. I didn't wanna get away, I wanted to be in his arms forever. 

And I mean it, literally forever. 

"Why is everybody so quiet?" Mum suddenly asks. I hear someone coughing. I turn and see Trisha trying to tell me something with her eyes. Oh, she wants us to tell them now. Now?!  
I turned to see Zayn, and watched him questingly. He nodded, and I coughed as well. I slowly rubbed my hands together before speaking. 

"Uh, mum, dad.. I have something to tell you." I said

"What is it, son?" Dad asks

"I have a s--" I was cut off by Travis' scream. I froze immediately. My eyeballs threatned to fall out. "u-uh, I, uh.. Would you excuse me for a moment?" I said and went to get Travis. He had woken up. I took him in my arms and waved him from one side to another until he calmed down. 

I decided to keep him in my arms. I walked ever so slowly downstairs and took deep breathes as I approached living room. Once everybody saw me, Trisha seemed proud. Zayn smiled, and Yaser nodded. Mum gasped and Dad just blinked his eyes. Safaa giggled and ran towards me hugging my leg. 

"Uh, honey.. Who is this baby?" Mum asked

"It's, uh, my baby.. Oh well actually.. It's mine and Zayn's baby.." I said and sat down next to him. Mum's eyes widened. And so did dad's. 

"What?" Dad asked

"Zayn got me pregnant, and I gave birth to this baby and it's our baby.." I said. "Oh, and thanks for the heads up." 

"Oh, I, uh.. I'm sorry Liam. I just never thought you'd have sex at such a young age. And even if you would've, I thought it's obvious that you use protection. Girl or a boy, safe sex is important." Mum explained. 

"Yeah, but why did you have sex?" Dad asks. I cough and look down, biting my lip. 

"Uh, we.. I mean, Liam wanted to be ready for his boyfriend, and I wanted to help him." Zayn scooted in

"Yeah, but Connor isn't my boyfriend anymore.. He told Zayn to tell me that he's breaking up with me." I said and mum gasped. 

"Oh my god, Liam, I'm so sorry..." 

"Oh please, I know you hated him." I scoffed. 

"Well I liked him, and I am sorry, son." Dad said. I nodded at him. 

"Thanks dad, but it's ok. I'm over it. I were gonna break up with him anyways. And now I have a baby, and Zayn taking care of me and our kid." I said and Zayn caressed my cheek. 

"What? Are you guys like together?" Mum asked, with eximent in her voice. I nodded, and so did Zayn. "Oh my goodness, I'm so happy for you guys..." She ran towards us and drowned us in kisses and then looked at the baby. "Can I...?" She bit her lip. I nodded but glanced at Zayn. Zayn nodded too. 

"Of course, mum." I said and carefully handed her the baby. 

~~*~~  
It was currently 7pm, and we were just about to eat dinner. Safaa were playing with Travis, or in other words watched him sleeping. And just disturbed him, haha. 

"Zayn, I want you to explain now." I pleaded and he smirked and shook his head. My smile instantly fell. "Zayn what is so horrible that you can't explain to me!!?" I hissed at him. His head snapped up. 

"Liam, don't ruin this." He said. 

"Why won't you just tell me what you were doing? Was is illegal or did you cheat on me? Just tell me, babe."

"It's a surprise.. To you, babe." He spat the word babe. "I can't tell you what it is, because then it won't be a surprise. But if you wanna know it that badly, then go ask your parents and ruin the whole surprise!! I'm out of here.." He yelled before storming outside. 

"Honey, what's going on?" Mum came walking towards the living room, and found me with tears in my eyes. I shook my head, and bursted out crying. She hugged me and swinged us from side to side. "Honey, tell me."

"I-I were j-just asking where h-he were earlier today, b-but he g-got m-mad a-at me. And h-he w-wont tell me.. W-What if he w-were cheating o-on m-me? Mum, he t-told me t-to a-ask you. T-Tell m-me m-mum, d-did he c-cheat on m-me?!" I spoke between my sobs

"Oh, honey.. He didn't cheat on you, of course not. Oh my god, sweetie. I can't tell you. It will totally ruin the surprise. But you're gonna love it. Oh babe, just trust me on this; he loves you, so much. He has always loved you, and now you guys finally got together. He's not gonna cheat on you, sweetie." Mum spoke and I nodded, and whiped my tears. 

"Thanks, mum." 

"Always honey. Now let's call him and tell him to come back inside." She says

"No use, I think I know where he went." I said walking outside. Zayn went probably to this little cabin where we used to play when we were younger. We used to come here, and go there. It was my favorite place in the world. Because I were with Zayn. Well that was little corny, wasn't it? Shut up, I'm original, leave me alone. 

"Zayn?" I asked as I pushed the door open. "Zaynie?" I asked in a little boy voice. "I'm sorry I asked you. I'm just curious, and I were worried if you cheated on me. But I asked my mum and she told me not to worry. And I'm telling you that too, don't worry. Because she didn't tell me any more than that. Just that I shouldn't worry, because I'm supposedly gonna love the surprise." I said 

"You should really listen to your mum." I hear a voice. Zayn's. I looked around me and found our old toys placed around. 

"Where are you, babe?" I asked

"Do you remember when we were fourteen or something, and I tried to put a new lamp but the ladders weren't strong enough to hold me, and they broke and I fell? Fortunately you were down there to catch me before I could injure myself.. I guess that was the first time ever when I noticed how amazing you were." He spoke again. 

"Zayn, come out where ever you are." I said, little serious this time. I looked behind the curtains. Not there. Behind the truck. Not there. 

"You remember the little attic, where I used to go when we were playing hide and seek? You never believed that I'd go up there because I were scared of heights.." He said, and I could swear I heard smirk on his face. Then it hit me. I heard his voice upon me. He was at the attic. I ran to the ladders, and saw that they were weak. But there were new footprints. I hesitantly stepped on them, and climbed up to the attic. Once I were there, Zayn weren't. What? I could've swear I heard him. 

I were just about to turn around and go down again, but my foot bumped into something, and I bend down, and almost fell but someone grabbed my arm and pulled me back. I were now facing the most gorgeous person on earth. Two beautiful hazel eyes. 

"Hi." He said, smiling. 

"Hey." I said, little breathless. I could've fall, and die. It's pretty high up here. "Uh, thanks for that." I said and he giggled before leaning closer. I wrapped my arms around his neck, and he wrapped his around my waist. 

"Am I forgiven?" He asked. I smiled and pecked his nose. 

"Ask me after a kiss." I said and he nodded before leaning closer and pressing our lips together. I huffed against his lips, and moved mines. 

After ten or fifteen seconds of kissing, we pulled away and he rested his forehead against mine. "Am I forgiven?"

"Definitely." I smirked and kissed him again. "But the surprise better be one hell of surprise." 

"Oh, well, uh.. I guess it is." He said, smiling at me. "But we should go, they probably want us to go and dine with them."

"Uh, yeah. Sure." I quickly pecked his lips before walking towards the ladders. 

~~*~~  
We returned the house, holding hands. And Safaa immediately ran towards us. I released Zayn's hand and welcomed Safaa into my arms. 

"LiLi, is everything ok? We waited for you guys." She asked, blinking her eyelashes. 

"Oh, sweetie. Everything's alright. We were just playing hide and seek, that's all." I said, and I didn't lie. I glanced at Zayn, and smiled at him. He smiled back. 

"Ooh! Hide and seek!! Can we play it?! Please!!" She begged. I chuckled at her cutenes and poked her nose. 

"Yes, honey, we can play it. But later, we have to eat now." I said and took Zayn's hand and we walked towards the kitchen. 

"Oh, and so they return." Trisha chuckled

"I thought I heard your voice, Son." Dad nodded. 

"Yeah, where's Travis?" I asked and Mum turned around, and she was holding him. She walked towards me, I took him and walked him to his bed which was currently at the living room. So if he would start crying, we wouldn't have to walk all the way upstairs and then back downstairs. And again if he cries, upstairs. 

"I'm back." I said and Zayn's face lit up and he patted the seat next to me. I sat down next to him, and took fork and knive into my hands and got ready to eat. 

"Wait, honey. Wait for everyone to be ready." Mum chuckled

"But I'm hungry mum.." I begged and she chuckled. 

"OK, I think we're ready. Go ahead honey, dig in." Trisha said and started eating as well. I looked at the rest and they had happily started eating. Including Safaa and Zayn. I started too, and it was ridiculously good. 

After the dinner, adults went to living room with wine and they talked about stuff. Me and Zayn took Travis to his room, and laid down on his bed and cuddled for a moment with our baby. 

"You ok?" He asked. I sighed and nodded. I kissed Travis' head, and nodded again. 

"Sure. Are you?" 

"I'm pretty sure you don't answer 'sure', when someone asks if you're ok.. Are you alright, Liam?" 

"I don't know, babe. I just.. I don't want us to start fighting, and ruin this whatever we have." I said quietly. Zayn cupped one of my cheeks, but I looked away. 

"Hey.. Hey." He said. I looked up at him. "I promise you, that even if we get into few fights, it won't ruin this whatever it is that we have. And you know how many fights we have gotten into in these 19 years?" He asks

"How many?" I ask, rolling my eyes at him playfully. 

"Not even ten." He says. "And most of them has been during your pregnancy, which means that they're because of your pregnancy hormones.. And I just don't think we're gonna fight more than we have so far. I mean, I've spend my whole life with you. And I don't think I could ever get tired of that." He said

"Zayn I--" He cut me off by pressing finger to my lips. 

"Shh.. I speak now." I nodded. He cleared his throat before continuing. "I'm not used to being sappy speaker, but when it comes down to you, I think that's pretty much all I can be. You make me romantic. I love you. I've loved you since we were sixteen. Well technically, I've loved you as long as I can remember, but I admitted it to myself when we were sixteen. I were in denial for sixteen years, and then I just decided that I guess I just have to face my real feelings. And when I did, it felt amazing." 

He pressed one kiss to my lips. 

"It felt amazing to admit something so powerful, and it was amazing to notice how truly beautiful you are. And how truly awesome you were. I've known you for nineteen years, and I have never wished that I didn't. And I really don't see a time where I'm not with you. Even if it's just as friends, I hope I will always be close to you. We share a kid, we share a connection. We have something. Really truly amazing, and I know that I wanna spend the rest of my life with you." He spoke. He whiped my tear away. Wait what? A tear? 

"Hah, I'm pathetic.." I giggled to myself. "I'm crying over nothing, I'm sorry." 

"You're not pathetic Liam, you're amazing." He speaks. "And I love you to the moon and back. And I'd take a bullet straight through my brain, and jump right in front of a train for you." 

"Really, Zayn? Bruno Mars, eh?" I giggled, wiping my tears away. But they were replaced by new ones immediately. 

"It's true Liam. You have no idea what I would do for you." He says, and suddenly I don't hear any sarcasm or flirt. His face has no smirk or smile, he just stares into my eyes, lovingly. Like I'm the billion dollars diamond. 

"You too, Zayn. You too. I'm not very good with words, but what ever you just said. I feel the same way. I love you." I said and he smiled before kissing me. 

"You do know that if our parents weren't listening behind the door, and if Travis wouldn't be between us right now, I would make love to you, right?" He asks, I froze, blushing. 

"Y-Yeah.. And you do know that I would really like it?" I ask, pecking his lips. 

"Yeah, I would too." He says before kissing my cheek. "I love you." 

"I love you too, Zayn." 

"Would it be special enough for you? You know; Me, making love to you. On this very bed?" He asked. 

"Yes, for two different reasons. One; you call it making love. And two; after what you just told me, I think a bathroom quickie would be special enough too. Because it's not about the place, or the time. It's about the person. I don't wanna make love, unless I'm in love. And I am in love with you, and we have passion, and we have understanding and connection. And it's gonna be special, whenever and where ever it happens.." 

"I don't need smoke to get addicted, because you're my own personal drug." He said. I felt tears dripping again. "Why are you crying again? Did I say something wrong?" 

"No.." I say, smiling through my tears. "I'm just so happy. I've never felt like I belong somewhere, but right now. Right here. I do. We have our families downstairs, and our son between us. And you are there in front of me. And I couldn't think of a better place. I don't think I want things to change. I might sound stupid or adult, but hell I wanna spend the rest of my life with you. And I mean it. I've never been so sure about anything else. Never. But now I am." I said, new tears streaming. "I love my life." 

I saw one happy tear sliding down Zayn's cheek. And blush creeping onto his cheeks as well. And this small smirk/smile on his lips. 

"I'm happy to hear that." He said, and kissed me. Ever so passionately. Ever so lovingly. "Like really really really happy to hear that." He said biting his lip, and looking into my eyes. Something flashing through his. 

"Why are you looking at me like that?" 

"Like what?"

"I don't know, like that." I said, and pointed his face. "What's the matter?"

"Uh, you'll see tomorrow."

"Aha, is this about what you were doing earlier today?"

"Yup, and babe, I promise you.. If you want to, you're gonna love it. Trust me." He said and I nodded. 

"I'm really tired. Should we go and say goodnight and put Travis to bed too?" 

"Yeah, you put Travis to sleep, and I'll go tell them goodnight from us. OK?" 

"Ok."

"I'll see you in five." He whispered kissing me

"See you." 

*Zayn's POV*

I walked downstairs, with this massive smile upon my face. I'm so in love that I can't think straight right now. I really wanna do it today, but I don't know if I should wait for tomorrow..  
I can't decide. I walked to the living room, and saw that Safaa had fallen asleep on dad's lap. And the rest of them were quietly talking, and drinking wine in front of the fire. I looked at the clock and it was 1am. 

Oh wow. 

"Hey, guys.. I think me and Liam are gonna hit the sack now." 

"Oh, ok. I'll see you two in the morning." Karen said. 

"Yeah, but quick question.. About the proposing. Do you guys still think that I should do it?"

"Of course son! He's gonna say yes, I'm hundred precent sure!" Dad exclaimed quietly

"Yeah, we talked and he said that he wants to spend the rest of his life with me. So the answer is not what I'm worried about. Well yeah, maybe he didn't like really mean it, so yeah I am a bit. But I meant, that I'm not sure if I should propose him privately, like when it's just me and him.. Or in the morning, when he opens a present from me."

"I think the present sounds cute." Geoff says. 

"Yeah it sounds really cute, but private proposing is more Liam's type." Karen says

"I think you should do what your heart tells you to do, Zayn." Dad says 

"I don't know what it tells me." I pleaded. "I think I want to wait a moment when it's just me and him, but it would be romantic if he would open a present what's from me. I can't decide." I said

"Just wait for tomorrow, and if you haven't decided in the morning, then we'll see it again." Mum says

"Oh, well.. I thought that I'd do it now, if I decide to do it privately. We had a long romantic, deep stuff talk. And it would be nice adding if I'd propose to him tonight. But I don't know if it's stupid to propose to him this late." I talked

"It doesn't matter what time it is, Zayn. If you feel like you want to propose to him tonight. I think you should." Karen says. 

"Really? You think so?"

"Yeah, I think tonight wouldn't be too bad." She repeated

"Ok, I'll do it tonight. Thanks guys!" I said. And kissed them all. 

"Goodnight babe." Mum said. 

"Night! Oh, and if he says yes, and if I were you.. I wouldn't come upstairs." I smirked wiggling my eyebrows. 

"Ew, Zayn! No! Not in my house." Dad said

"I'll make sure we use protection." I said running upstairs. I heard chuckling, ok, I think they got it.

I ran towards my parents room, to get the box. I found it and took a good look at it. It was nice. I then hid it in my pocket, and walked towards my room. I opened the door, and peeked to see Liam. He were sitting on the bed, lighting a candle. I frowned my brows.. Why is he lighting a candle? 

"Hey.." I whispered smoothly. His face snapped up. 

"Uh, hi, babe." 

"What are you doing?" I ask curiously. He doesn't get how ironic this is.. He is lighting a freaking candle, and I'm about to propose to him. I felt a lump in my throat. 

"Uh, I thought I'd just spice it up a little bit." He joked. "No well seriously.. I wanted to make it special." He said looking down. 

"Oh, you mean it?" I asked and he nodded. "So you want to do it tonight?" He nodded. "Is that a yes?"

"Yes." He nodded some more. I bit my lip, oh I wish he will say that again little bit later. 

"Great. Just wait.. I'll go and change into.. less clothing I guess." I said and going to the bathroom. He were smirking and started to unbutton his button up shirt.  
I took a deep breathe, and stripped myself from my shirts and pants. I were only on my boxers, and I were holding onto the box with my hands. I think it's now or never if I'm gonna do it. 

I walked into my room, and Liam had lightened few more candles. It was breath taking. I felt like throwing up, but I knew I had to do it. Well I didn't have to do it, I wanted to do it, and there was no backing out now. Well technically there was but... Oh shut it. OK. 

"Uh, Liam?" I asked and he turned to see me. He were on his boxers as well. Well this is surely gonna be romantic, hah. 

"What is it babe?" 

"Uh, I wanted to ask you something." I said. Well duh, Zayn?! 

"Alright, what is it, babe?"

I walked to him. "That sappy speach I had little bit earlier, I meant every word. And I just wanna know if you did too."

"What? Like every word I said?" He asked and I nodded. "Of course I did. From the part where I said that I love you, to the part where I said I wanna spend the rest of my life with you." 

"That's nice. Because..." I kneeled down, and looked up at him. 

"Zayn..? Are you--" He didn't finish, because I cut him off. 

"Proposing you?" I asked. "Yeah.." I looked at him for a second or two, and he looked at me. 

"Well, go for it." He said, sounding little excited. 

"Are you gonna say yes?" I asked, not sure if I should propose. If he says no, I can't handle it.

"Yeah.." He nodded, smiling furiously. "Just go for it." I smiled and opened the box. 

"Uh.. Liam James Payne, will you marry me?" 

"Yes! Yes, yes, yeah yeah. Of course, yes." He kept saying and I smiled and slipped the ring to his finger. I got up and threw the box away, and kissed him. I hovered on top of him, and pinned him against the bed. 

"I..Love..You..So..Much" I said between the kisses

"I..Love..You..Too" He said between the kisses as well. "Oh, and make sure to use protection." He smirked

"W-What?"

"I don't wanna get pregnant again."

"Ever?"

"Yes, I do. But not right now, Zayn. I'm only nineteen, I think a fiancee and one baby is enough for me right now." He smirked and I shook my head before kissing him. 

"You and the baby is all I'm ever gonna need." I said

"You're not proposing just because I gave birth to our baby, are you?" He asked, breaking the kiss. I scoffed playfully at him. 

"No. Absolutely not Liam. I mean, I love you and I wanna spend the rest of my life with you. And of course the baby made me wanna propose, but with or without the baby, I would've proposed eventually."

"So, are you proposing now because of the baby? Would have you proposed if I wouldn't have given birth to him?" He asked, and I started panicking, because I wasn't sure. I didn't know what I would have done, if things weren't like this. "Silence is also an answer." Liam said pushing me away. 

"Liam, no don't be like this.." I said, tears forming into my eyes. 

"Like what? Looking out for myself? Well I'm sorry if I don't wanna get fooled, Zayn. I was an idiot for thinking that you'd actually like to propose me because you really cared about me, but I guess I was wrong. I guess I was wrong about you, Zayn.." Liam said before taking his clothes and leaving the room. 

I groaned and fell to the bed, tears streaming down my face. I honestly don't know how to answer Liam's question. I mean, I love him, and I do wanna marry him. I love the idea of him being my husband, and us having a dog, and three kids and our parents talking while our kids running on the backyard of our new home. And me and Liam, sitting in the patio, holding hands, and thinking about the good old days. For example, the day when I proposed him. 

I heard the door went and I heard one femine sigh. It was my mother. I didn't react, I just cried and cried. I heard her blowing the candles and then walking to me. 

"Oh baby.. What happened?" She asked. I shook my head, not being able to use my words. Not being able to trust my words. "Honey, you have to tell me... What happened? Liam came crying downstairs, with only on his boxers. He was totally heartbroken and he begged Karen and Geoff to pack their stuff and leave while he was pul--" I cut her off, my head popped up, eyes widened, filled with tears. 

"They're gone?!" I shouted. Mum's face was filled with compassion, and pity and love. She bit her lip, and whiped the tears off my cheek. 

"I'm afraid so, honey." 

"It's all my fault.." I said, burying my face into the pillow again, crying harder and louder. Mum caressed my back, whispering sweet nothings to me. 

It took something close to twenty minutes before I fell asleep, and mum left the room.  
It wasn't suppose to go like this... I were suppose to propose him, romantically and he was suppose to say yes. Then we were suppose to kiss and I were suppose to make love to him. And we were suppose to whisper little I love you's, and fall asleep in each others arms.  
It wasn't suppose to go like this. Maybe I'm just a kid, maybe I'm just juvenile little kid. Maybe I'm romantic juvenile little kid. No, better; I'm just a romantic juvenile stupid little kid.  
I did something wrong, well of course I did. I always mess things up. I've loved Liam ever since he were in that car accident. But it's common. It's all cliché. Because when I were about to lose him, I understood how much he really meant to me. How much I actually cared. 

He is the first and probably the last person, who has ever really understood me. I don't want anyone else understanding me. I want him. I realized I were in love with him, when no physical or emotional pain could have been worse than losing him. I have no words describing how it felt back then, I just have no words.  
I realized I were in love with him, when I saw that he was lying in coma. When I thought that, this could be him dead right now. If I hadn't gotten here in time, they would have given up. And they would've, they would've given up on Liam. My blood was match, and I saved his life. I felt honoured, I felt happier than I had ever felt before. Nothing else mattered back then, nothing else but Liam. 

I realized I were in love with him, when I spend my school days, and free days sleeping next to him. It was few days when he were in coma, but I never left his side. Well I went to home to get some sleep. But I came instantly back, only to find sleeping Liam. And it hurt me so much. But the day when he woke up, was the best day of my life.  
It was the day, when my life got purpose again. 

*Flashback* 

Everyone thinks I should stop visiting. It's been five days already, he should have been woken up already.  
The doctors think that Liam isn't gonna wake up, that the car accident was that bad.  
They all should just listen to me, when I say that he is gonna wake up. I mean, I were the one who got the feeling that he was in danger. I got this feeling, and I were right. And now I have a feeling that he will wake up, any time soon. We should all just give him few more days. If he isn't gonna wake up, then we should re-think, but for now, we should just wait..  
I were now currently, walking to see him. With his teddybear in my hands, and tears streaming down my face. This is how I always go see him. I always think that one day I will go there, and find his bed empty. His bed empty, and few doctors inside his room, greeting me with sympatic eyes. 

Apologizing for giving up.

Then I realize that I'm being stupid, that they're not gonna do it because his mum doesn't allow it. She's counting on my feeling. She doesn't tell that to the doctors of course, they would think that we're crazy. And maybe we are, but at least I were right last time, why not now? 

I opened the hospital doors, and something flew right through me. This feeling. Psychichs don't exist, and I don't believe in that kind of stuff. But when I'm saying that I instalty felt like something was different, would be understatement. I just felt like it. It was more than a feeling, but it wasn't as strong as knowing something. I can't explain it, it was like...I was 100% sure something was different.  
I sped up, and almost ran towards the elevator. The doors closed right before me, and I groaned loudly. I ran towards the doors, and climbed three stairs. I had six or seven stairs to go. 

Once I were in the right floor, that feeling in the pit of my stomach got stronger. So did my speed. I ran, literally ran towards his room. I had few doctors and few visitors looking at me like I'm crazy or something, but I ignored them and ran to his room. I stopped right in front, and frowned my brows. Liam's name wasn't on the board anymore.  
Is he...Is he dead? Tears formed into my eyes. I took few deep breathes, and ever so slowly opened the door. I stepped in and my heart stopped, the bed was empty.  
I let out loud sob, no it was more of a whimper. I saw a bag with his stuff in it. Stuff that I had brought and bought to make this look more homey. I scoffed and sat down onto his hospital bed. I flopped the teddybear to a trash can and burried my face into my hands, and I cried. 

I cried more than I had never ever cried.  
How can Liam be dead? No, he... HE CAN'T BE DEAD!?!?! He can't be dead.. But he is.. No he is not.. But he is..  
Why do this to me? I can't live without him.. I've been dealing with the fact that I'm actually in love with him for the past few days, and now that I've finally accepted it, (surprisingly soon) they decide to kill him off.  
Liam doesn't deserve to die at such a young age. He's only sixteen. I AM only sixteen. I'm in love with my best friend, and they kill him off.  
My tears were like a river, until I heard a gasp in the room. I chose to ignore it, probably a doctor with a pity face, and sympatic eyes. 

"How can you throw Mr.Bear away??" I heard a low voice asking. My heart started beating again. Louder and faster and faster than it had ever beated. I looked up only to see Liam smirking. 

My breathe hitched, and I spurted up and ran towards him, tagling him into a hug. 

"Don't you ever do that again!!" I hissed at him. "I hate you so much, Liam!!!" I spat, hugging  
him ever so tightly. I cried out loud, and I felt few tears of his on my shoulder. I pulled away and met his red puffy face. 

"I'm so sorry, Zayn." He said. I pulled him into a hug. 

"I love you so much Liam." I practically squeezed the fucking life out of him. He only chuckled and hugged me back. 

"I love you too, Zayn." He said smoothingly. No, only if he knew what way I loved him. I loved him more than a best friend. 

"So so much Liam, don't you ever leave me!" I whined and he pulled away, kissing my cheek.

"I won't, Zayn. I promise." He said, and took his backpack. "Did you drive here?" 

"Y-Yes." I stuttered, still not believing that he's alive. "Why?"

"We're going home." He flashed smile. 

*Flashback over* 

I can never explain the relieve when I saw him. I had never been so happy before, and I have never been that happy again.  
I loved him, and I thought he was dead. And then he wasn't, so.. Saying that I were happy and relieved, would be understatement.  
~~*~~ 

The next day I woke up, the pain was still there. But it wasn't all there. The guilt was all there, but some of the pain had vanished. I can't believe that I made Liam run away from me. I can't believe I couldn't say no to his answer. I'm in love with him, and of course if I'm proposing him, I wouldn't do it just because of the baby.  
I wish he will listen to me when I get the change to explain him that.  
It's 25th of December, and I should go downstairs and open some presents, but I don't really feel like doing that. And I hope my family understands that.  
I heard the door opening, I guess not. 

"Zaynie?" Safaa asked quietly. I didn't answer. "Zayn, are you awake?" She asked, as she climbed on top of me. 

"Yeah, I'm awake, darling." I answered truthfully. 

"We're gonna open some presents, Zayn. You think you could come downstairs?"

"I don't think so, Safaa. I'm not in the mood. Two of the best presents I could ever ask, is gone. So, until I get Liam and the baby back, I don't think I even wanna." I said and she sighed. She nodded and kissed my cheek. 

"Just remember that you can come downstairs, you know.. We love you, and we want you to open few presents, but we totally understad if you don't wanna." 

"I know, Safaa. I know. I just really don't see a reason why I would. I appreciate it, tho. Tell that to mum and dad, ok?" I asked and she nodded before leaving my room.  
I sighed before turning around, and fixing my position. I don't wanna ruin others Christmas just because my and Liam's Christmas is already ruined. Oh my god, what if Liam is just like me? What if I ruined their Christmas as well?  
No, I will not think that well. And what comes down to my family, and our Christmas. I shall not ruin that. I will go downstairs, and open few presents and make everybody happy, tho I'm far from that.  
I got up from my bed and put on my some socks before taking my phone and dropping it to my pocket, before quietly walking downstairs.  
I peeked behind the wall, to watch what they're doing. And I saw Safaa smiling happily, playing with the doll Liam got her. I then heard her reading the note, which had Liam's name, and everybody fell quiet. 

I took a breathe and walked towards them. 

"Oh, hey! Look who decided to show up!" Dad exclaimed. 

"Thought I'd stop by." I said and he nodded. 

"You doing alright?" Mum whispered, not wanting Safaa to hear adult problems. 

"Not really, but I'm better than last night." I sighed and she nodded. "Thanks, tho.." I said and they nodded. Both of them.

"Zayn, Zayn! Look what I got from mum and dad!!" She exclaimed. 

~~*~~  
People say that time heals. But that's where they're wrong. Time does not heal. It actually make things worse. It has now been almost two weeks since that incident thingy with Liam in my bedroom.  
I did try and call him, but it always went straight to voicemail, and then I just eventually stopped. I gave up. I don't deserve his forgiveness. Not clearly. Because he's not even giving me an opportunity to apologize and explain.  
I don't know what I would say, tho. What to apologize for. I mean, I did it out of love. I did to express my feelings for him. I wanted to show him, that I'm gonna be there for him because of the baby, and because it's my duty to take care of both of them. And because I want to. Because I love him. And the baby. 

I wanna tell him that I didn't propose him because of the baby we share, but I'm afraid he won't believe me. I'm pretty sure he thinks I 'love' him only because of the baby as well. So practically it doesn't matter what I tell him. It's all up to him, whether he believes me or not. I won't blame him if he choses not to. But I wish he will.  
It's first day of school tomorrow, after Christmas break of course. And I'm suppose to drive back to the college today. Me and Liam share a dorm, and I don't really know what to say or how to react when I see him.  
I'm scared he wont ever watch me in the eyes, not like he used to. 

"Honey, are you ready?" Mum asks, holding one of my backpacks, as I watch out of the window, thinking of Liam. 

"Uh, no.. But I have to go now if I wanna get in there before dark. I'm gonna be ok mum." I said and she nodded before pulling me into a hug. "I love you, mum."

"I love you too, sweetie." She said. 

"Tell dad I said hi, ok? And Safaa too!"

"Of course, honey." Mum said, and that's when I was gone. 

The next few hourse I drove, I drove through the citys, thinking of all the ways I could beg for his forgiveness. The way I would look at him, when I would open the dorm door and be greeted with his eyes.. I couldn't seem to be thinking of anything or anyone else than Liam.  
Finally I were there. I took a shaky breathe, and grabbed my bags and walked inside the building. I was greeted with few friendly faces, and I greeted them back. I walked towards our dorm, and streams forming inside my eyes. I were really emotional, and I wasn't fully sure if I would really handle this. 

Then there it was. Our dorm door. I rapidly walked towards it and opened it, before I would get the chance to change my mind and walk away.  
I forced a smile, to be able to greet Liam with a smile. But my smile soon faded when I walked inside the dorm. Every last bit of confidence I had build up inside me during the way here. 

Every last bit of hope I had build up inside me, was now gone. My smile was long gone, along with the hope and the confidence. I had tears streaming down, my face and I dropped my bags down and jumped to my bed.  
The dorm was half-empty. Meaning that Liam had took his stuff, and either moving to another dorm, or leaving the whole college.  
No. This can't be happening. I can't lose Liam. Not now, not ever. NO. I cried like I had never cried before. This is the second time Liam slips through my fingers, tho this time won't be a mistake. Liam won't come back. 

I heard the door opening and I heard footsteps. 

"Are you Zayn Malik?" A man's voice asked. I lifted my head, and were greeted with friendly green eyes, with many many bags. 

"Yes, I am. Who are you?" I asked, whiping my tears away. 

"Nice to meet you Zayn, I'm Ryley, your new roommate." He said, extending his hand. I took a shaky breathe, before shaking his hand. "Are you alright, Zayn?" 

"Yes, I am. Nice to meet you too, Ryley." I said before leaving the dorm for a bit.  
~~*~~  
It was now the official first day of college, and I were officially nervous. Nervous if I would bump into Liam. If he still goes here. Which would be really ridiculous if he didn't.  
He was so scared to miss college because of his pregnancy, so he's not gonna drop out just because we are on the outs.  
I walked to the first class of the cemester, and I were immediately greeted with millions of eyes. Everyone looking at me, as the door slammed close behind me. Grab, I'm late.. I tried to search a free chair. And I spotted one, I started to walk closer to it, but my heart stopped as I saw who it was. 

Liam.  
I took deep breathes, and walked in front of him. 

"U-Uh, c-can I sit here?" I stuttered. Mentally slapping myself for sounding so pathetic. He seemed like he wanted to kill me right there. 

"I guess not, but you probably have to.. So, sure. It's not like it's taken by someone." He said and glancing on his left, tugging on Travis' blanket. 

"Oh, how is Travis?" I asked carefully, and Liam's head popped up. Oh oh, wrong subject. 

"He's ok, but when it comes to you and me, I don't think we're that0 good. So you can sit there all you want, but please don't expect me to speak to you, ok?" He spits, and I nod. 

I turned my head away, and tried not to cry. I saw with the corner of my eye, that Liam looked at me. And that's all that it took. One or two tears escaped my eyes, and I quickly whiped them away before anyone could see, but Liam did. He saw.  
The tears were replaced with many more, and I took my books and looked at Liam who was watching me with hatred eyes, but I wasn't sure if I saw regret, pity, sympathy or something friendly in them as well. 

I got up and quickly ran away from that class room, tears streaming down my cheeks, so my vision were blurry and I couldn't see I were about to bump into someone.  
"Ufhm!" I whined as I fell to the ground. 

"Oh god, I'm so sorry. I'm so sor--" He stopped. "Oh, Zayn! Hey, are you alright? You're crying again?" He asked. 

"I'm f-fine.." I whined. It was Ryley. I don't wanna tell him that I have boyfriend problems. Or ex-boyfriend, I'm not even sure if Liam and I are done or not. 

"No you're not, you're crying again.. Zayn, I know we don't know each others yet, but I want you to know that you can trust me, ok?" 

"Well, you could start earning my trust towards you, if you helped me stand up." I said and he chuckled before lifting me up. "Thanks, points for being nice and obeying me." I giggled and he shook his head playfully while chuckling again. 

"Nice, thank you." He said. "Now, tell me what's wrong?" He asked carefully. 

"Uh.." I whined and looked at my feet, tears streaming down my cheeks.. I felt pair of fingers on my chin, and he lifted my face up. He pressed his lips against my forehead, and pulled me into a hug. 

"Hey!!" I heard someone hissing. "What the fuck are you doing?!" He yelled. It was Liam. Wait, what? Liam? 

"What are you doing?" I asked him. He put Travis down before pulling Ryley away from me. 

"Liam, what the fuck are you doing?!" 

"He's my boyfriend, don't you dare touch him!!" He hissed at Ryley. 

"What are you on about, dude? I'm not coming onto Zayn, I just met him last night and I'm his new roommate. His last one moved away." Ryley explained. 

"Yes, his boyfriend. Which is me." Liam said through gritted teeth. Still having Ryley pressed against the wall. 

"Liam, leave him alone!! You can't just get mad at me, and ignore me for two weeks and then say things like that what you said in the classroom and now when I have someone comforting me about it, you can't just storm here and expect that your act is fine. Well it's not.." I said, and I had numerous tears in my eyes. Liam's eyes were heartbreaking. 

"I can if you break my heart!!!?" He yelled. "You fucking broke my heart and you just asked if Travis were alright. Well he's ok, but I'm not.. You broke my heart, Zayn." He said

"Well, Liam.. You kinda broke mine too." I said before turning around in my heels and started walking. Liam ran in front of me, bloking the view. 

"Wait, please don't go.. Give me another chance. Zayn, please. I know I wasn't fair towards you, but I were really sad. You proposed me only because you got me pregnant." 

"No I didn't, I proposed you because I loved you. Pregnant or not pregnant." I said. 

"Which is bigger reason to take me back.. You love me and we share a kid.. Zayn please, I'm so so sorry.. When I saw how hurt you were back in the classroom, I immediately realized that mistake was made. I knew that I had to see a smile upon your face, and I wanted to be the person that makes you smile." Liam spoke. 

"No, Liam.. I need time. I want time." 

"Why you need time if you love me?" He asked, whiping his tears off of his cheeks. 

"To make sure if I love you enough to get back together." I said, heart breaking into pieces. 

"What if I proposed you? Would you say yes or no?" He asked

"Uh, I don't know.. Probably yes, because I do love you no matter what.. But I don't know.. Maybe you would propose me just to get me to take you back." I said and he shook his head furiously. He took something from his pocket. His ring. The ring I proposed him with. 

"No." He said firmly, before kneeling down in front of me. The doors opened from few classrooms, and students were coming from everywhere. Liam didn't get up, he only watched them gather around us. "It wouldn't be because of that." He said and I gulped.  
"I believe you, Zayn Malik. I believe what you said is true about not proposing me just because of Travis. I believe you. And now I want you to trust me on this, I'm not gonna propose you because I want you to take me back. Well kinda yes, I want you to take me back. But I also want you to marry me. Because I love you. And I'm so freaking sorry." He said, softly. 

"Liam, get up before you embarrass yourself." I said, tugging onto his arm. 

"The only way I'm gonna embarrass myself is if you say no, which I hope you wont. But.. Zayn Jawaad Malik, will you do me the honour and forgive me all the bad things I did and said, and marry me?" 

I felt guilty, for not wanting the proposal to go this way, but also hope because I wanted to marry him no matter what. I felt weird because everyone were watching, including Liam. But I knew the answer I wanted to say out loud, more than anything else right now. Just it. 

"Yes." I whispered and he gasped, before smiling and putting the ring to my finger. And standing up. "Kiss me you fool." I said and he smiled again, before connecting our lips.  
My hands went to his neck, and his went to my waist, pulling me closer to him. The people cheered and whistled around us. I pulled away, blushing, and turned around to meet Ryley. And he was smiling and clapping too. He was actually happy for us. So I guess he wasn't homophobic. 

I turned to see Liam again. 

"Hi." He said and I giggled. 

"Hey, babe." 

"I missed you." He said, pulling me inside a hug. I squeezed him so tightly, and I saw people were leaving and Ryley brought Travis closer to us. 

"Thanks, Ryley. And I missed you too babe. Let's go to my and Ryley's dorm alright?"

"Good thing I didn't unpack." Ryley laughs

"Why is it a good thing?" Liam asked

"You're so gonna move back to Zayn's. I can move to your dorm, ok?" Ryley smiles. Liam kisses my cheeks, romantically and flirting. 

"Fine by me.." He whispered 

"Me too, Ryley. Thanks." I said

"Anytime." He said back. 

~~*~~  
It was now three days since Liam proposed, and we were walking to the grocery store, and Ryley stayed at my and Liam's dorm to take care of Travis. I know he will take good care of him, because he has one older sister, two younger brothers and one younger sister, and his father is passed away years ago and his mother is always at work so he used to take care of his siblings. 

"What do we need for Travis? Diapers?" I asked, taking Liam's hand in mine. He smiled at me, and squeezed my hand. 

"Yes, diapers and uh.. Milk powder. Because we can't actually give him our milk." Liam laughed 

"Yeah, 'cause that'll be weird." I laughed too. 

"Ok.. Milk, diapers, what else?" 

"Maybe a chocolate for Ryley for taking care of him?" I asked

"Good idea, babe. Chocolate for Ryley, ok, what else?"

"Babe, why do I need to come up with everything?" I chuckled

"You are the brains, and I'm the..voice"

"Yeah, right.." I said in sarcasm. 

~~*~~  
"No, I love you more.." Liam said to me. I shook my head, and kissed him once. 

"No, it's not possible, I love you more." I said and he giggled. 

"Shut up, and face the reality. I actually love you more." 

"You're avoiding the truth baby, that's not possible when it comes down to me loving you. I love you so much, Liam. You don't even understand how much." I said and Liam's face went into this serious. 

"Tell me."

"I love you Liam, and when I say that I love you, hell I really mean it. More than anything else I've ever loved. You are my world, and not even my family mean as much as you mean to me. I know it sounds awful, but it's true. I love my family, of course I do, but you are my family." 

"You've turned your life into a mission where you need to find the right words to make me cry." Liam giggled through the tears and sobs. "I love you too, Zayn. And I've never been good with words, but I know how you're feeling because I feel the exact same way about you." 

"Good. So I wont leave you and you wont leave me?" I asked, and Liam chuckled

"It's deal." He leaned closer to kiss me. And we fell to his bed. We were in our dorm currently. "But right now... All I want is you.." He whispered in my ear. 

"L-Liam.." I whimpered and Liam nibbled on my earlobe. 

"What was that?" He asked. "Do you know what I wanna do to you? I wanna take off your clothes, ever so slowly, until you're naked. I wanna fuck you with my fingers until you're begging for me. I want to punish you for making me cry again. I want you to understand that I love you." Liam said before tossing away my shirt, sucking my neck. 

"Oh, take me, hotly, on this very bed. Yes, god, Liam." I moaned as Liam continued sucking my neck. 

"I shall grant your wish." He smirked. 

"Please do."

He tugged on my shirt, and slowly pulled it off. I groaned in frustration and he smirked. I then pulled off his shirt, as fast as I could. He then kissed me once, before reaching for my pants. And I pulled his off too, leaving us both in our boxers. He hovered on top of me, and I wrapped my legs around his waist and my hands around his neck, resting our foreheads against each others. 

"Why are you topping?" I asked him and he shrugs. "You know, this reminds me of our first time. Your first time. My first time. Our first time. Tho it was me topping, and you had your legs wrapped around my waist, but the rest was same." I explained and smile grew upon his lips

"Yes, I remember, Zayn. You were very gentle and caring with your moves and slids and hands and kisses and just everything, Zayn." 

"Yeah I know. Then the next day, not so much anymore, huh?" 

"Yeah, no.. But there was a difference. First time was making love and the second time were just having sex, more likely drunk sex." 

"It doesn't mean I automatically are gentle and caring in sex. I only were because it was you, and I never wanted to hurt you. Or push you to do something you don't wanna do.. And mostly, I just wanted you to feel good. I thought slow, romantic and intese sex is best. Especially when you're in love with the person, and I were in love with you." I said, my cheeks heating up a little bit. He just pinched my cheeks. 

"Well, it did make me feel good.. And you made me feel so safe and loved. I remember thinking that 'Is it wrong for me to think that tho is is the most awkward thing that has ever happened to me, I've never felt so safe and sound?'... And no, it wasn't wrong." 

"You thought that way?" 

"Yeah, I did. You always inted to make me feel as safe as possible. Why's that?"

"Because you're mine and only mine, and I'm super protective over you, and I love you.. Of course I want you to feel safe and loved around me." I said, tugging on the waistband of his boxers. 

"Zayn, just take them off.." Liam groaned, dropping his head down, sucking onto my neck. I giggled before pulling down his boxers.

~~*~~  
*3 years later* 

"Yes, mum, the suit is okay. Now let me get my cards." I chuckled as my mum kept fixing my suit. 

"Come on babe, you're graduating... You need to look good." She demanded. 

"And I do, now let me go. I need to go, to graduate." I giggled and she shook her head before opening the door for me. I picked the speech cards and walked out of the room.  
I walked to the section were all the students were. I saw Liam there. Aw, there is my beautiful fiancée. I smiled and walked up to him. He walked up to me too, so we met in the middle. I kissed him, wrapping my arms around his waist, and he did the same, wrapping his hands around my neck. 

"Longest two hours of my life." I giggled. 

"Me too, I think we even broke a record of not being with each others." He said back. I smiled. "Where's Travis?"

"With your parents." I pointed them, and Travis looked around smiling like an idiot. Oh, I love that idiot so much. 

We're now 21 years old, and we're graduating today. I can't believe College is over. We just started and Liam just got pregnant. We just got together. Travis is 3 years old and he's amazing. Me and Liam are still happily together. Unfortunately we're still only engaged, not married. We're not rushing. We wanted to get school out of the way first, and then think about marriage. 

"Zayn.." Liam whimpered, holding his stomach, and looking down. 

"What now babe?" I asked, worried

"I think I'm gonna be sick." Liam said before running off to the bathrooms. I quickly followed him, only to find him kneeling down, emptying his stomach. 

"Baby.." I kneeled down next to him, placing my hand on his back. He emptyed his stomach again, gagging. I winced my face in disgust, but held him tigther. "Baby, I got you."

"Zayn.." Liam whimpered. "I need to tell you something." 

"What is it baby?" I asked, caressing his back. 

"Don't get mad at me, ok? I love you and I should've told you earlier I just couldn't figure out how.." Liam mumbled

"It's ok, I love you too. What is it?" I asked, curious now. No, anxious more likely. 

"I think I'm pregnant." He admitted, biting his lip. My jaw dropped, and my eyes widened. 

"P-Pregnant-t??" I stuttered. He looked slowly down in shame, and nodded. I panicked, no he got it wrong.. "No no no, babe. I'm not mad. I'm surprised. I'm shocked, but I'm so fucking happy. Baby we're gonna be dads again!!" I giggled as I pulled him up into a disgusting puke-filled kiss. 

"So.. You're not mad?" He asked as we pulled away. I hugged him and shook my head. 

"Not one bit." I pulled away and pecked his lips before pulling out two pieces of bubble gum. 

"Here, take this." 

"Thanks." He said before taking them and chewing. "We better get going." 

"Yes, come on, daddy." I teased and took his hand as we walked back. 

"You're really not mad?" He mumbled and I giggled, squeezing his hand. 

Not one bit. 

~~~~ 

"I always knew that you two were gonna end up together. Marrying each others, and having kids, I just knew it." My cousin Theo says as my and Liam's family gathered at my place after our graduation

"Theo, shut up." I mumbled and took Travis gently into my arms. He giggled and looked into my eyes. He looks exactly like me and Liam. And bit of Travis. 

"It's alright babe, I really like the sound of that. Other people knew it before it happened." Liam giggled into my ear, crossing his arms around my waist. 

"Yeah, you two were special kind of best friends. You always seemed to be so much more, but both of you were so oblivious to it." Karen said

"No, don't forget that Zayn's wasn't. He told me about his feelings towards Liam when they were 16." Theo said and sat down next to Liam's mum. 

"Did you?" Liam asked me with curious look and I bit the inside of my lip, shrugging. 

"Might've mentioned it." I blushed

"Mentioned? Oh boy, he couldn't stop talking about you. How you held his hand and kissed his cheek. How you two locked your eyes and all he could think of was to kiss you and tell you how he's madly in love with you." Theo continued

"Ok, Theo, you can stop embarrassing me now." I chuckled, my cheeks flaming hot and red. Liam chuckled behind me, squeezing my hips. 

"Baby, is that true?" He asked and I shrugged again

"Maybe." 

"Oh, babe, I love you so much." He says kissing my cheek. "Talking about baby, do you think  
we should tell them already?" He whispers into my ear

"Only if you want to." I say and he nods. 

"I do. I really really do." He smiles. "Do you want to or do I tell them?"

"You can tell them, it's you who's giving birth either way." I chuckled and he nodded. 

"Okay, everybody; me and Zayn have important news." Liam says and everybody gathered around to hear what he's about to say. 

"What is it son?" Geoff asks

"I'm pregnant." Liam says and people gasp. Liam's mum squeals and runs towards us, pulling us into a hug. 

"Oh my goodness, that is wonderful." She says, kissing our cheeks. "So lovely."  
I see and hear people congratulating us, smiling and whistling. 

I wouldn't change anything. Nothing. Absolutely nothing. I love everything about my life. Everyone in my and Liam's family. I wouldn't change anything. None of this. I dont regret ever having sex with my best friend, I dont regret falling in love with him either.  
Not one bit.


End file.
